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in the past when students did a University degree they tended to study in their own country, nowadays they have more opportunity to study abroad

in the past when students did a University degree they tended to study in their own country, nowadays they have more opportunity to study abroad YmN1d
Students tried to learn in their own country when undergraduates had knowledge of university in erstwhile, currently they can study with different chances abroad. From my point of view, they can feel taste of real studying in different experience with professor of university, additionally they have different journeys and resorts. On the other hand, it may also lead to the deterioration of cultural identity and money problems may be happened. To the begin with, nowadays majority pupils can obtain to conveinences in other countries and has some good sides. First of all studying abroad lead to perfect knowledge, since students usually try their own experiment with controlling of professors, for this reason they can achieve cram for an exams. Secondly during time when they study other areas of the world, they see what the student will be like. Too, undergraduates present own projects in various conference which usually research work is organized and give own plans by students. For example, students always try to present own plans to their group who study together and as a result they become genious. As for the drawbacks, although study abroad make different comfortable items, undergraduates may face to various problems. There are deterioration of culture, usually many pupils study other countries and they learn other's culture instead of own culture. Besides that, students should make more studying and less work. However if they do not work enough, problems of money will be come out. For instance students must leave their universities to earn money for after a while restart or davom ettirmoq studying or learner may makr crime sometimes in megacountries. In conclusion, learning other areas make more opportunities compared to studying own country. While students will not doubt obtain great result and travelling, on the other hand there may be a money issue involved in acheiving own results
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
tried to learn in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
when undergraduates had knowledge of university in erstwhile,
currently
they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
chances abroad. From my point of view, they can feel taste of real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
experience with professor of university,
additionally
they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
journeys and resorts. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it may
also
lead to the deterioration of cultural identity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
problems may
be happened
.

To the
The word 'begin' is not a noun. Did you mean "beginning"?
begin
with, nowadays majority pupils can obtain to
Possible spelling mistake found.
conveinences
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
sides.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
abroad lead to perfect knowledge, since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
usually
try their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experiment with controlling of professors,
for this reason
they can achieve cram for
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "an exam" or simply "exams"?
an exams
.
Secondly
during time when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
areas of the world, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
what the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
will be like. Too, undergraduates present
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
projects in various conference which
usually
research work
is organized
and give
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
plans by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
always try to present
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
plans to their group who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
together and
as a result
they become
Possible spelling mistake found.
genious
.

As for the drawbacks, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
abroad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
comfortable items, undergraduates may face to various problems. There are deterioration of culture,
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
countries and
they learn other's culture
instead
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture.
Besides
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
and less work.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
if they do not work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, problems of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out.
For instance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their universities to earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for after a while restart or
Possible spelling mistake found.
davom
Possible spelling mistake found.
ettirmoq
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
or learner may
Possible spelling mistake found.
makr
crime
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
megacountries
.

In conclusion
, learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more opportunities compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will not doubt obtain great result and travelling, on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand there may be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
issue involved in
Possible spelling mistake found.
acheiving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
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IELTS essay in the past when students did a University degree they tended to study in their own country, nowadays they have more opportunity to study abroad

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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