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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend? v.19

In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. v. 19
Shopping is necessary part of our daily life because this is the regular way we collect products as per our needs. In the past, buying things was very conventional and people went to the shop only if they were running out of any items like foods, clothes etc. However, people has changed their attitude with the time and now they have taken this habit as a great way of spending their free times. I believe, this behavior is moving on right track and following paragraphs will explain the reasons. To begin with, shopping malls allow people to enjoy their leisure times with friend and family in beautiful and secured environment. Roaming around the market and looking for the desired product kills our boring time and gives us refreshment. This is the reason people love to go for shopping and it does not compulsory that someone has to buy something when they go for it, they can just have a look of the items and enjoy the time. For example, a recent poll by Bangladesh government found that 68% customers visit Basundhara City Shopping Mall just to make their lazy time awesome without any intention of buying things. In the past people could not do this because shopping centers were not very available. Secondly, people love to be trendy and fashionable which has been easier for this shopping habit. People, specifically young boys and girls go to shopping centers frequently and check what is new in there. Specially their favorite section is dress and accessories corner. That’s why, going to shop has become popular in today’s generation. For instance, Cambridge University has found in recent research that 75% young people believe shopping is useful to be fashionable. Earlier people has less sense about new fashion. In conclusion, people change or upgrade their mentality with times and this is common in nature. So I strongly support that, the changes in shopping habit we found is totally positive.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
is necessary part of our daily life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this is the regular way we collect products as per our needs. In the past, buying things was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
conventional and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
went to the shop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if they were running out of any items like foods, clothes etc.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
their attitude with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they have taken this habit as a great way of spending their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
. I believe, this behavior is moving on right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
and following paragraphs will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the reasons.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to enjoy their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
with friend and family in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and secured environment. Roaming around the market and looking for the desired product kills our boring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and gives us refreshment. This is the reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to go for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and it does not compulsory that someone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
something when they go for it, they can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
have a look of the items and enjoy the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For example
, a recent poll by Bangladesh
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
found that 68% customers visit
Possible spelling mistake found.
Basundhara
City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
Mall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their lazy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
awesome without any intention of buying things. In the past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could not do this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
centers were not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
available.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to be trendy and fashionable which has been easier for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
habit.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
,
specifically
young boys and girls go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
centers
frequently
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
what is new in there.
Specially
their favorite section is dress and accessories corner. That’s why, going to shop has become popular in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s generation.
For instance
, Cambridge University has found in recent research that 75% young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is useful to be fashionable. Earlier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
less sense about new fashion.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
or upgrade their mentality with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
and this is common in nature.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I
strongly
support that, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
habit we found is
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. v. 19

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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