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In the past, most people lived in the countryside and worked in farming. Some people believe that this was a better way of life than the way most people live today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the past, most people lived in the countryside and worked in farming. Some people believe that this was a better way of life than the way most people live today. 7EOy
The way people live has changed dramatically since the turn of the 20th century. While some people say that living in the countryside and working as a farmer was a better way of life, I think the lifestyles people lead today are much better for three main reasons. Today, most people dwell in cities where there is a sophisticated healthcare system. If people fall sick, there are always qualified doctors on call. In contrast, people living in rural areas who mostly were involved in agriculture succumbed to common ailments such as flu and colds. Even worse, diseases like plague and cholera claimed a lot of lives as people did not know cure for them. With the advent of the internet and technology, there are now many employment opportunities. The arrival of the internet has led to the creation of many kinds of jobs, which allow even disabled people to be employed. However, in the past, only physically strong and capable people could work in the agriculture, making the handicapped too reliant on other family members. In addition, the most positive aspect of today’s life is the availability of conveniences. While some people might argue that the life was stress-free and simple in the past, I think that higher standards of living that we enjoy today is the small price we have to pay. For example, the absence of electricity, running water or household appliances like washing machine or vacuum cleaner made the lives of villagers physically demanding, tying them to their household for the entire day. To sum up, not only do modern lifestyles offer higher standards of living and healthcare system, but they also provide more work opportunities. Therefore, I totally disagree with the idea that the way villagers lived was better than we live today.
The way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
dramatically
since the turn of the 20th century. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the countryside and working as a farmer was a better way of life, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the lifestyles
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
are much better for three main reasons.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
dwell in cities where there is a sophisticated healthcare system. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
fall sick, there are always qualified doctors on call.
In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in rural areas who
mostly
were involved
in agriculture succumbed to common ailments such as flu and colds. Even worse, diseases like plague and cholera claimed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
did not know cure for them.

With the advent of the internet and technology, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
employment opportunities. The arrival of the internet has led to the creation of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of jobs, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
even disabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
be employed
.
However
, in the past,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
physically
strong and capable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could work in the agriculture, making the handicapped too reliant on other family members.

In addition
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today’s
life is the availability of conveniences. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might argue that the life was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-free and simple in the past, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that higher standards of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
that we enjoy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
price we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay.
For example
, the absence of electricity, running water or household appliances like washing machine or vacuum cleaner made the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of villagers
physically
demanding, tying them to their household for the entire day.

To sum up, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do modern lifestyles offer higher standards of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
and healthcare system,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
provide more work opportunities.
Therefore
, I
totally
disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that the way villagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
was better than we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
today
.

IELTS essay In the past, most people lived in the countryside and worked in farming. Some people believe that this was a better way of life than the way most people live today.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
297 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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