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In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. Do you agree or disagree?

In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. bYDo3
It is believed by some individuals that in the coming years people will prefer to stay in home country on holiday rather than to go travel to another country. I completely disagree with this point of view and I believe that international tourism will increase due to many reasons, which will be discussed further in this essay. To begin with, most of the people always dream to have a holiday in a foreign location. In other words, most of these tourists prefer to choose vacation places which are far away from their country, due to the fact that these people would like to change the atmosphere. Just like people living in plains want to visit mountains or beaches, some of people from colder countries prefer to visit warmer or tropic countries and vice versa. For example, according to recent survey conducted by Travel Magazine, countries like Thailand and Indonesia attract more than 70% of the tourists from all over the world. Secondly, most of the people travel to explore and discover the cultural and historical heritage of other countries. This is not only broaden their horizons, but also teaches them various aspects of this place. There are so many countries in the world with antic places, which must be visited and seen at least once during the life. To confirm, recent statistics and results of World Tourism Organization shows that almost 35 percent of people travel to learn cultural differences and historical places. For this reason, people will continue to travel abroad. To summarize, the tourism sector is currently hit by many flying restrictions. However, it will rise back to previous popularity as soon as world will recover from the COVID-19 pandemic. I believe that holiday-goers will continue to discover new countries and will not be stay at home country.
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals that in the coming years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will prefer to stay in home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
on holiday
rather
than to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. I completely disagree with this point of view and I believe that international tourism will increase due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons, which will
be discussed
further
in this essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always dream to have a holiday in a foreign location.
In other words
, most of these tourists prefer to choose vacation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
which are far away from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, due to the fact that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the atmosphere.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Just
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in plains want to visit mountains or beaches,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from colder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
prefer to visit warmer or tropic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and vice versa.
For example
, according to recent survey conducted by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Travel
Magazine,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Thailand and Indonesia attract more than 70% of the tourists from all over the world.

Secondly
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to explore and discover the cultural and historical heritage of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
broaden their horizons,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
teaches them various aspects of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the world with antic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be visited
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
at least once during the life. To confirm, recent statistics and results of World Tourism Organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that almost 35 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to learn cultural differences and historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
For this reason
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will continue to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
abroad.

To summarize
, the tourism sector is
currently
hit by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
flying restrictions.
However
, it will rise back to previous popularity as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as world will recover from the COVID-19 pandemic. I believe that holiday-goers will continue to discover new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and will not be
Consider using a past participle here: "staid", "stayed".
stay
at home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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