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In some societies the numbers of crimes committed by teenagers is growing.some people think that regardless of age teenagers who comit major crimes should receive adult punishment.to what extent do you agree

It is believed by few communities that the criminality is increased which is accomplished by adults and it is also feel by individuals that the youngest er criminal should get the punishment and should not care regarding age. I partially agree on this statement and this essay will highlight my point of view with relevant reason and appropriate example. To begin with, crime rate has increased manifold in these days because for various intention, in addition to, the young generation also do the crime for various purposes and for to reduce the illegality done by the teens the government should be taken strict steps. hence, various juveline schools should be set up in every country, the reason behind this is, every offender should be punished for his/her crime if it is teenager or adults. Moreover, in juveline the adolescent improve their mentality and acquire knowledge and also realised their mistake. there are various juveline offending for the minor culprits. On the other hand, minors commit crime because they are not mature but to provide them a punishment of adults it is totally wrong because young people are mature and they know what is right or what is wrong. Sometimes, the gentleman commit the felony in its agression or their crime may be intentionally. however the teens have lack of knowledge and they are not grown up with theirs mind. in minority, the child influence with action, drama and media regarding this they take a wrong move and become a villain. that's why, the kid should not be able to receive a punishment of young people. To sum up, to provide the punishment to culprits for its misademeanour is the right justice however, for to penalised the lawbreaker if it is assumed that the minor and young are equal this is the injustic.
It
is believed
by few communities that the criminality
is increased
which
is accomplished
by adults and it is
also
Consider using a past participle here: "felt".
feel
by individuals that the youngest er criminal should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
and should not care regarding age. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
on this statement and this essay will highlight my point of view with relevant reason and appropriate example.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate has increased manifold in these days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
intention,
in addition
to, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation
also
do the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
purposes and for to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the illegality done by the teens the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
be taken
strict steps.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
Possible spelling mistake found.
juveline
schools should
be set
up in every country, the reason behind this is, every offender should
be punished
for his/her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
if it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
or adults.
Moreover
, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
juveline
the adolescent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their mentality and acquire knowledge and
also
Possible spelling mistake. 'realised' is British English.
realised
their mistake.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
Possible spelling mistake found.
juveline
offending for the minor culprits.

On the other hand
, minors commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are not mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to provide them a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
of adults it is
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mature and
they know what is right or what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, the gentleman commit the felony in its
Possible spelling mistake found.
agression
or their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
may be
intentionally
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
however
the teens have lack of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
knowledge and
they are not grown up with theirs mind.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
minority, the child influence with action, drama and media regarding this they take a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
and become a villain.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
that
's why, the kid should not be able to receive a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To sum up, to provide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
to culprits for its
Possible spelling mistake found.
misademeanour
is the right justice
however
, for
Did you mean "to penalise"?
to penalised
the lawbreaker if it
is assumed
that the minor and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
are equal this is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
injustic
.
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IELTS essay In some societies the numbers of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. some people think that regardless of age teenagers who comit major crimes should receive adult punishment. to what extent do you agree

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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