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In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies.Discuss advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Experience gained at early stage of life will always benefit to the students for their later survival. In many countries, like India for instance, students prefer to work in their vacation period, while in other region some prefer travelling. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will express my opinion on advantages and disadvantages of choices made by people in opting their choice. The main benefit of starting work or taking a break in an education at an early stage for couple of years is, they get practical experience of dealing with people. Communication plays a vital role in an individuals life, if started at early stage of life will help in long term for survival in any field. For instance, a student working as a sales associate or working in food outlet like 'Mac Donalds'. Such work experience helps individual to deal with the different types people, not only that, it also helps to earn and save money for thier future aspirations, like for higher studies or may be travelling to thier favourite destinations. Also, there are certain problems associated when such decision are taken at early stages of life. On the other hand, being self reliant is the best thing, but one should have ability to understand the difference between part time and full time working. Some people give up on their education when they start earning. Though money plays an important part, but completing higher studies can help in providing the wider opportunites. Such people regret their decision of leaving studies and earning part time at later stage of life. In conclusion, I feel that having good communication with practical experience is good to have at early walk of life, but one should also have plan of achieving short and long term goals successfully.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Experience
gained at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
will always benefit to the students for their later survival. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, like India
for instance
, students prefer to work in their vacation period, while in other region
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
prefer travelling. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will express my opinion on advantages and disadvantages of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
choices


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
made
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in opting their choice.

The main benefit of starting work or taking a break in an education at an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
for
It seems that an article is missing.
couple of
years is, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
of dealing with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Communication plays a vital role in an
An apostrophe may be missing.
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in long term for survival in any field.
For instance
, a student working as a sales associate or working in food outlet like 'Mac
Possible spelling mistake found.
Donalds
'. Such work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
individual to deal with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that, it
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to earn and save money for
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
future aspirations, like for higher studies or may be travelling to
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
Possible spelling mistake. ‘favourite’ is British English.
favourite
destinations.
Also
, there are certain problems associated when such decision
are taken
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stages
of life.

On the other hand
, being
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
self reliant
is the best thing,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one should have ability to understand the difference between
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
part time
and full time working.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give up on their education when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
earning. Though money plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
completing higher studies can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in providing the wider
Possible spelling mistake found.
opportunites
. Such

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
people
regret their decision of leaving studies and earning
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
part time
at later
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of life.

In conclusion
, I feel that having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
communication with practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to have at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
walk of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one should
also
have plan of achieving short and long term goals
successfully
.
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IELTS essay In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
295 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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