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In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. Write at least 250 words.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. o0mK
Young people are the future leaders of a country, and therefore, it only makes sense that we take necessary steps to groom them up as responsible adults from their young age. Of course, we can do several things to this effect, but encouraging them to work or travel for a year after finishing their high schools is certainly an option, even though it has both its advantages and disadvantages. To begin with the advantages, students spend a very significant amount of their time to finish high school and learn some important “theories” that are related to general life lessons and works. However, when students go to work, they learn to deal with many different kinds of “real-world” situations and thus being able to learn some very important life lessons. Similarly, when students go to travel, it allows them an opportunity to recuperate from the tiring hard works and “disciplined” life of students by sharing and exchanging different views and opinions on an array of issues with people from different cultures, lifestyles and backgrounds. Sometimes, they even go through some life-changing experiences when travelling to places. However, this practice has some disadvantages as well. After taking some time off from the education, in order to either work or travel, students may not find it easy again to get their concentration back as they used to do before taking their time off after finishing their high schools. Besides, it is also possible that they start to like their life, outside of school environment, and they just may never go back to attend a college or university in order to further their education, which certainly is not an ideal situation for any society or country. In conclusion, we should carefully weigh our options before allowing our students some time off in order to work or travel, and teachers and parents can guide the young students in choosing the right direction.
Young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are the future leaders of a country, and
therefore
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sense that we take necessary steps to groom them up as responsible adults from their young age.
Of course
, we can do several things to this effect,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
encouraging them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
for a year after finishing their high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is
certainly
an option,
even though
it has both its advantages and disadvantages.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with the advantages,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
spend a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
significant amount of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to finish high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
“theories” that
are related
to general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
lessons and works.
However
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they learn to deal with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of “real-world” situations and
thus
being able to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
lessons.
Similarly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them an opportunity to recuperate from the tiring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
works and “disciplined”
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
by sharing and exchanging
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views and opinions on an array of issues with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures, lifestyles and backgrounds.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, they even go through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
life-changing experiences when travelling to places.

However
, this practice has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages
as well
. After taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
off from the education, in order to either
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may not find it easy again to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their concentration back as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
taking their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
off after finishing their high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
Besides
, it is
also
possible that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to like their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, outside of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
environment, and they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
may never go back to attend a college or university in order to
further
their education, which
certainly
is not an ideal situation for any society or country.

In conclusion
, we should
carefully
weigh our options
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
allowing our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
off in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
, and teachers and parents can guide the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in choosing the right direction.
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IELTS essay In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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