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In some countries, secondary schools aim to provide a general education across a range of subjects. In others, children focus on a narrow range of subjects related to a particular career. Which of these two systems is more appropriate in today’s world?

In some countries, secondary schools aim to provide a general education across a range of subjects. In others, children focus on a narrow range of subjects related to a particular career. Which of these two systems is more appropriate in today’s world? elPB
Although most children today enjoy the right to receive an education, it is not within their power to decide what subjects they may study. Regarding this matter, educational theorists still find themselves at loggerheads over whether secondary schools should impart knowledge of various fields, or concentrate on teaching only a few selected subjects relating to a certain sphere of education. From my perspective, I reckon that secondary educational content should be narrowed down for students. First of all, fewer choices of subjects to study at school will create a window of opportunity for students to blossom socially. To further explain this, students will not constantly find themselves in a battle against time trying to complete their homework, prepare for new lessons, or review for upcoming exams. Instead, they will have more spare time to spend outdoors, be with their friends, or just be with themselves. In this way, their self-confidence or communication skills will be boosted significantly. It has been found that secondary students nowadays are feeling more stressed and overwhelmed than ever before, and the reason to explain this is quite self-explanatory. Today, many children consider their school's prisons and their teacher's correctional officers who would not stop giving them dull assignments to complete. When the inspiration to study is almost non-existent, it is understandably difficult for students to keep a good performance at school. Consequently, the quality of education, on the whole, will go downhill. To conclude, I hold the firm belief that the schools should focus on a small choice of practical subjects so that the lives of secondary students should not be fettered down by any undue responsibility.
Although most children
today
enjoy the right to receive an education, it is not within their power to decide what
subjects
they may study. Regarding this matter, educational theorists
still
find themselves at loggerheads over whether
secondary
schools
should impart knowledge of various fields, or concentrate on teaching
only
a few selected
subjects
relating to a certain sphere of education. From my perspective, I reckon that
secondary
educational content should
be narrowed
down for students.

First of all
, fewer choices of
subjects
to study at
school
will create a window of opportunity for
students
to blossom
socially
. To
further
explain
this,
students
will not
constantly
find themselves in a battle against time trying to complete their homework, prepare for new lessons, or review for upcoming exams.
Instead
, they will have more spare time to spend outdoors, be with their friends, or
just
be with themselves. In this way, their self-confidence or communication
skills
will
be boosted
significantly
.

It has
been found
that
secondary
students
nowadays are feeling more
stressed
and overwhelmed than ever
before
, and the reason to
explain
this is quite self-explanatory.
Today
,
many
children consider their school's prisons and their teacher's correctional officers who would not
stop
giving them dull assignments to complete. When the inspiration to study is almost non-existent, it is
understandably
difficult for
students
to
keep
a
good
performance at
school
.
Consequently
, the quality of education,
on the whole
, will go downhill.

To conclude
, I hold the firm belief that the
schools
should focus on a
small
choice of practical
subjects
so
that the
lives
of
secondary
students
should not
be fettered
down by any undue responsibility.
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IELTS essay In some countries, secondary schools aim to provide a general education across a range of subjects. In others, children focus on a narrow range of subjects related to a particular career. Which of these two systems is more appropriate in today’s world?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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