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in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

In some countries, the ownership of people's home is an important matter. In these countries, it is very important to own your own home rather than renting it. It might be indifferent for some, but for these people it matter. Why is that the case? you might wonder. I think it is because your home is supposed to be exactly what it sounds like, your home. As a human I think we long after having stuff to call our own, doesn't matter what it is, but humans will always want to claim ownership. This is nothing new and it has been like this through human history, like colonies for example, which later once again became the same country as before lead by its own inhabitants. People will always want to be the one to decide what happens to them and when your rent your home you can't even paint it without the owners permission. If you as a person are renting an apartment there might be a lot of stressors in your life. A scratched wall can cause you a major headache, because the wall was not yours. The bedroom you are currently sleeping in might not be available as long as you hope, things happen in life and maybe the next landlord won't want to have you as a tenant. In other perspective, not owning your home could be a relief when it comes to your finance. As a renter you won't have to pay mortgage, take loans or spend an awful lot of money on buying the property. You wouldn't have to worry about the house market crashing or a natural disaster destroying your expensive home. Bottom line, as a human I feel like we need to have a home and calling it your own can make that more special. I personally would rather own my house, because then whatever happens it is on me and no one else.
In
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some
countries, the ownership of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's home is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
matter. In these countries, it is
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very
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important
to
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own
your
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own
home
rather
than renting it. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be indifferent for
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some
,
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but
for these
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people
it matter.

Why is that the case?
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you
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might
wonder. I
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think
it is
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because
your home
is supposed
to be exactly what it sounds like, your home. As a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we long after having stuff to call our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
, doesn't matter what it is,
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but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
will always want to claim ownership. This is nothing
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
new and
it has been like this through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
history, like colonies
for example
, which later once again became the same country as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
lead by its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
inhabitants.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
will always want to be the one to decide what happens to them and when your rent your home you can't even paint it without the
An apostrophe may be missing.
owners
permission.

If you as a person are renting an apartment there
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
stressors in your life. A scratched wall can cause you a major headache,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the wall was not yours. The bedroom you are
currently
sleeping in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not be available as long as you hope, things happen in life and maybe the
next
landlord won't want to have you as a tenant.

In other perspective, not owning your home could be a relief when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to your finance. As a renter you won't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay mortgage, take loans or spend an awful lot of money on buying the property. You wouldn't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
market crashing or a natural disaster destroying your expensive home.

Bottom line, as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
I feel like we need to have a home and calling it your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
that more special. I
personally
would
rather
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
then whatever happens it is on me and no one else.
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IELTS essay in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
321 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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