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In some countries, only a few young people go to classical music concerts or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more?

In some places, only a limited number of young people attend classical music concerts or play this kind of music. In my opinion, the reason for this comes from the change in young people’s taste of music, and it is not necessary to encourage them to learn classical music. Music nowadays is diverse in genres, and classical music no longer has the dominant role like in the past. In fact, the majority of young people now pay attention to trendy music types, such as rock, pop and hip hop, and many consider classical music to be a thing of the past. This is the reason why they find no interest in either attending classical music concerts or learning to play this genre of music. In addition, it is not necessary to encourage young people to find out more about classical music since it brings little practical value to their daily lives. The knowledge about classical music contributes almost nothing to most young people’s study and career, and therefore spending time learning it can be a waste of time. In terms of entertainment, many young people now find it more enjoyable listening to pop, rock or R&B rather than classical music. Encouraging them to find out about what is not of their interest may bring no positive results but just reluctance. In conclusion, the major reason why only a few young people attend classical music concerts or play this music genre is the change in their taste of music. I also believe there is no need to encourage them to learn more about classical music due to the little value it brings.
In
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some
places,
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only
a limited number of
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young
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people
attend
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classical
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music
concerts or play this kind of
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music
. In my opinion, the reason for this
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comes
from the
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change
in
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young
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people’s
taste of
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music
, and it is not necessary to encourage them to learn
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classical
music.

Music nowadays is diverse in genres, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
no longer has the dominant role like in the past. In fact, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
pay attention to trendy
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music
types, such as rock, pop and hip hop, and
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many
consider
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classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to be a thing of the past. This is the reason why they
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find
no interest in either attending
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classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
concerts or learning to play this genre of music.

In addition
, it is not necessary to encourage
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young
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people
to
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find
out more about
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classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
since it brings
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little
practical value to their daily
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lives
. The knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
contributes almost nothing to most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
study and career, and
therefore
spending time learning it can be a waste of time. In terms of entertainment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
it more enjoyable listening to pop, rock or R&B
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. Encouraging them to
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find
out about what is not of their interest may bring no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
results
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
reluctance.

In conclusion
, the major reason why
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only
a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
attend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
concerts or play this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
genre is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in their taste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. I
also
believe there is no need to encourage them to learn more about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
due to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
value it brings.
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IELTS essay In some countries, only a few young people go to classical music concerts or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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