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In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

In my opinion, in a well developed country such as the Asia, local goverment should have a role and regulation when the children start to have education, either kiddy grade or primary school. However, it should not be the govermment's responsilibity but now it's back to their parent's. How much the country are required to do not have to start they are seven. However in other country's it able for kids going to school under seven. Some of the parent is easier to childcare and to get more experience while their playing and fast growing with friends. In this case, is good to see the kids are playing and fast growing than if they do not have any activity at all. Now back to rules each country and depend of individul parents if they wont to bring their kids to school or wait until seven or eight years to go to school. However we must to follow each regulation of each countries, because not all the country are the same opinion and that is just my opinion. That is what i do to my kids.
In my opinion, in a
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
well developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
such as the Asia, local
Possible spelling mistake found.
goverment
should have a role and regulation when the children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to have education, either kiddy grade or primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
However
, it should not be the
Possible spelling mistake found.
govermment
's responsilibity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it's back to their parent's.

How much the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
are required
to do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
they are seven.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
in other country's
It seems that a verb is missing after “it”. Please verify.
it able
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
under seven.
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
Some of the
parent is easier to childcare and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more experience while their playing and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
growing with friends.

In this case
, is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are playing and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
growing than if they do not have any activity at all.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
back to
The verb after “to” should be in the base form: “rule”.
rules
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
The verb ‘to depend’ requires the preposition ‘(up)on’: “depend on”.
depend
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
individul
parents if they
Did you mean “want”?
wont
to bring their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
or wait until seven or eight years to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
we
After ‘must’, the verb is used without ‘to’. Probably, you should use “must” or “have to” here.
must to
follow each regulation of each
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “country”?
countries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
are the same opinion and
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
my opinion.
That is
what
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
do to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
.

IELTS essay In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
185 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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