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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary fr governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary fr governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion? W3eD
Excessive consumption of fast food has led to a growing number of people with debilitating conditions in some countries around the world. Therefore, some have argued that governments can control this problem by increasing the tax on junk foods. This essay will discuss the pros and cons of this argument before declaring a position. First, by raising the cost of fast foods, more People will be forced to opt for healthier alternatives, such as fruits and vegetables, which are generally more affordable. These kinds of foods are rich in nutrients that are beneficial to the body. In turn, they reduce the risk of serious health problems. Co-morbid conditions, such as cardiovascular diseases and diabetes, for example have been linked with frequent consumption of processed foods. Therefore, when people are discouraged from purchasing these foods, they will live healthier lives. On the other hand, some might argue that imposing a higher task on fast foods does not effectively tackle the growing public health problems of most nations around the world. This is because majority of the population that eat pre-packaged foods are usually youths and working class citizens. Therfore, raising awareness among this groups is a more effective option. For example, health education programs were organized when I was in high school on the health impacts of junk foods. The result was that more students were motivated to opt for healthier alternatives. This clearly shows the positive impact of health education. In conclusion, though raising the tax on fast food can discourage some people from consuming fast food, this is only limited to a group of the population. A more effective solution to the growing number of people with serious health conditions, therefore, is in my opinion, creating more awareness about the dangers of processed foods in targeted populations.
Excessive consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has led to a growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with debilitating conditions in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries around the world.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
have argued that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
can control this problem by increasing the tax on junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This essay will discuss the pros and cons of this argument
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
declaring a position.

First
, by raising the cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will
be forced
to opt for healthier alternatives, such as fruits and vegetables, which are
generally
more affordable. These kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are rich in nutrients that are beneficial to the body. In turn, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems. Co-morbid conditions, such as cardiovascular diseases and diabetes,
for example
have
been linked
with frequent consumption of processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
Therefore
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are discouraged
from purchasing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
healthier
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
might argue that imposing a higher task on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
does not
effectively
tackle the growing public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems of most nations around the world. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
majority of the population that eat
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-packaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are
usually
youths and working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
citizens.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Therfore
, raising awareness among
Did you mean "these"?
this
groups is a more effective option.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
education programs
were organized
when I was in high school on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
impacts of junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. The result was that more students
were motivated
to opt for healthier alternatives. This
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
education.

In conclusion
, though raising the tax on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can discourage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, this is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
limited to a group of the population. A more effective solution to the growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conditions,
therefore
, is in my opinion, creating more awareness about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
of processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
in targeted populations.
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IELTS essay In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary fr governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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