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In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a probem

In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a probem OkEM
Technology has changed lifestyle of mankind. It has become possible to travel long distances in no time. Purchasing power of people significantly increased in recent time which resulted in more personal vehicles on the road which are creating traffic jams. However there are also some more reasons behind this terrible problem. Here in this essay I will present my opinion on the same. To begin with, Firstly, the road network in the past was design was failed due to rapid increase in number of vehicles on the road in shorter time due to vast advancement of technology and increased demand of private vehicles. The increasing demand of private vehicles is due to inefficient public transport facility provided by government. Due to this reason people have to travel by their own vehicles to reach their work place or any other place to reach on time which results in increase in traffic jams on the road. Secondly, there is a lack of awareness among people about traffic sense for example in many Asian countries people avoid following traffic rules. The consequence is traffic jams for longer hours on roads. However, these problems can be resolved If People understand traffic rules and drive vehicles according to rules. This will decrease traffic jams on the road. Apart from that a good Public transport system with cheap fair would decrease number of personal vehicles on the road which are main cause of traffic jams. Besides government should limit number of vehicles owned by single person like in Singapore, government has made strict rule and do not permit new vehicles on the road above certain limit. To sum up, I feel that the problem of traffic is not easy to control however; Government rules and awareness among people can resolve this problem up to certain limit.
Technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
lifestyle of mankind. It has become possible to travel long distances in no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Purchasing power of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
significantly
increased in recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which resulted in more personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
which are creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
more reasons behind this terrible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. Here in this essay I will present my opinion on the same.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
network in the past was design
was failed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to rapid increase in number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
in shorter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to vast advancement of technology and increased demand of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. The increasing demand of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to inefficient public transport facility provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Due
to this reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
travel by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
to reach their work place or any other place to reach on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which results in increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
Secondly
, there is a lack of awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
sense
for example
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Asian countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
avoid following
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
. The consequence is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams for longer hours on roads.

However
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
can
be resolved
If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and drive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
according to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
. This will decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
. Apart from that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Public transport system with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
would decrease number of personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
which are main cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams.
Besides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should limit number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
by single person like in Singapore,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has made strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rule
and do not permit new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
above certain limit.

To sum up, I feel that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
is not easy to control
however
;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can resolve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
up to certain limit.
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IELTS essay In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a probem

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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