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In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development? v.8

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 8
In modern times, customers prefer shopping from a huge shopping complex than a small local shop. I assert that this is a positive development. This essay will initially talk about the variety and range offered at discounted prices in such malls and then it will talk about other services offered at such places. Firstly, shopping centres are more popular with customers owing to a variety and range of the products it serves on the shelf. Shops at such locations not only has multiple brands, but also have discounted prices, which is a huge benefit. These shops are able to get the benefits of economies of scale as compared to the local shops and hence can pass on the pricing advantage to its customers. In addition, all malls have numerous products ranging from clothes, watches, cosmetics, shoes, toys to name a few. Entire family can do their shopping at one place. For instance, adults can do a grocery shopping and children can get some toys at the same place. Secondly, these malls also offer other services apart from shopping. Such services include entertainment and food. Enjoyment has become very significant in everyone's life and therefore it is the main crowd puller. Shopping malls have multiplex and gaming zones, which provides refreshment for the adults as well as children. Furthermore, the mall also provides immense food varieties to the customers. For instance, city people mostly make a full day plan to visit malls as they get all shopping, enjoyment and food everything in one place. To conclude, I think it is a positive development. People are visiting more shopping malls because of the benefits they are getting in shopping and availability of various entertainment options.
In modern times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
from a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
complex than a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
. I assert that this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development. This essay will
initially
talk about the variety and range offered at discounted prices in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
and then it will talk about other services offered at such places.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
are more popular with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
owing to a variety and range of the products it serves on the shelf.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shops
at such locations not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has multiple brands,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
have discounted prices, which is a huge benefit. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the benefits of economies of scale as compared to the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
and
hence
can pass on the pricing advantage to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
.
In addition
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
have numerous products ranging from clothes,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watches
, cosmetics, shoes, toys to name a few. Entire family can do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
at one place.
For instance
, adults can do a grocery
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and children can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
toys at the same place.

Secondly
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
also
offer other services apart from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
. Such services include entertainment and food. Enjoyment has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
significant in everyone's life and
therefore
it is the main crowd puller.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
have multiplex and gaming zones, which provides refreshment for the adults
as well
as children.
Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mall
also
provides immense food varieties to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
.
For instance
, city
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a full day plan to visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
, enjoyment and food everything in one place.

To conclude
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are visiting more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the benefits they are getting in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and availability of various entertainment options.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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