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In poorer families, children have to work part time as well as study. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

In poorer families, children have to work part time as well as study. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages. e5V6K
It is believed by some individuals that mediocre families' children are to have part time job along with schooling. Having part time job in order to support themselves has its merits, but there are also some drawbacks concerned with studying. The major merit is that children may become rather independent and provide themselselves with basic necessities. Thanks to earlier job experience children may obtain self-reliant personality in terms of buying things, paying recreational expenses and for saving for study in the long run. With said that, young people who have part time work can sustain themselves not burdening their parents. Furthermore, it is a great opportunity to better development of a person; when someone earns money, they may try to be more sociable and problem solving at the early ages. Becoming more deliberate, they try to improve their living conditions as compared to their current family. However, one possible drawback of early employment is having less time for home assignment. By having part time job, students may be scarce of energy and desire to do additional practice. This may lead to dire consequences. To exemplify, students can have high levels of absenteeism and getting lower grades in school. Besides, employed youth may be obcessed with the idea of making money, not grasping about future education, which is the most imperative in their ages. Consequently, reluctance for the further schooling may be obstacle to gain high qualification. To reapitulate briefly, being engaged with part time job children may become self-sufficient, however it may often lead to lack of time for hometask and school involvements, which are the main requiries for school teenages.
It
is believed
by
some
individuals that mediocre families'
children
are to have
part
time
job
along with schooling. Having
part
time
job
in order to support themselves has its merits,
but
there are
also
some
drawbacks concerned with studying.

The major merit is that
children
may become
rather
independent and provide
themselselves
with
basic necessities
. Thanks to earlier
job
experience
children
may obtain self-reliant personality in terms of buying things, paying recreational expenses and for saving for study in the long run. With said that, young
people
who have
part
time
work can sustain themselves not burdening their parents.
Furthermore
, it is a great opportunity to better development of a person; when someone earns money, they may try to be more sociable and problem solving at the early ages. Becoming more deliberate, they try to
improve
their living conditions as compared to their
current
family.

However
, one possible drawback of early employment is having less
time
for home assignment. By having
part
time
job
, students may be scarce of energy and desire to do additional practice. This may lead to dire consequences. To exemplify, students can have high levels of absenteeism and getting lower grades in school.
Besides
, employed youth may be
obcessed
with the
idea
of making money, not grasping about future education, which is the most imperative in their ages.
Consequently
, reluctance for the
further
schooling may be obstacle to gain high qualification.

To
reapitulate
briefly
,
being engaged
with
part
time
job
children
may become self-sufficient,
however
it may
often
lead to lack of
time
for
hometask
and school involvements, which are the main
requiries
for school
teenages
.
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IELTS essay In poorer families, children have to work part time as well as study. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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