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In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home? nK2g
I fully agree with the above statement, teenagers want to spend more time with their friends but not with their parents. One of the reasons behind it can be carefree lifestyle children wanted to adopt, with no responsibility. So, in my opinion parents should make their understand that they should spend quality time with their children. Reason- Children want to spend time with their friends because they want to new learn different things and spending time with their parents is just wastage of time. Another reason behind it can be the they feel parents as burden not as the responsibilities. On the other hand, in my opinion parents should not force their children to spend time with their children but can engage in the activities which are they interested. Due to which they would love to spend time together and also able to learn new things,
I
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. One of the reasons behind it can be carefree lifestyle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
wanted to adopt, with no responsibility.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
The word 'rebrand' is not a noun. Did you mean "understanding"?
understand
that they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their children.

Reason-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to new learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things and spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
wastage of time.

Another reason behind it can be
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "they"?
the they
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as burden not as the responsibilities.

On the other hand
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should not force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
can engage in the activities which are they interested. Due to which they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together and
also
able to learn new things,
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IELTS essay In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
146 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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