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In many parts of the world, people are choosing to have fewer children. Why do you think this is happening? What impacts may it have on society?

In many parts of the world, people are choosing to have fewer children. Why do you think this is happening? What impacts may it have on society? BJ73a
With the passage of time, people around the world had decided to have fewer kids. Some people consider that this is happening as people have to spend more time at work and have less time to be at home with their families. This essay will discuss this reason, as well as, the effects that this has on society. To begin with, some parents need to spend more time at work than at home, which has made them choose to have just one or two kids. For instance, a professor at The University of Sydney explains that when he interviewed parents, 75 per cent of them said that they choose to have fewer children as in this way they could spend more time each of them. This could indicate that increased work time and reduce home time is a major reason for having fewer children. Having fewer children has had positive and negative effects on society. In the positive side, it has helped to reduce global population, which has a direct impact on the reduction of waste and global warming. However, in the negative aspects, it may result in having more older than younger population. A city in Kansas is a clear example of this negative and positive effect, since 1985 people decided to have just one or no children, this has resulted in a reduction of 50 percent of their waste production. However, now most of their population is over the age of 75 and there are not that many younger people to take care of them. In conclusion, it can be seen that over the world many people are opting for having fewer children. Some people consider that this is happening as parents have less available time to have bigger families. Although it has positive effects on society such as reducing global population, it also has negative effects as no having younger populations.
With the passage of
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time
,
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people
around the world had decided to have fewer kids.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider that this is happening as
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people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at work and have less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to be at home with their families. This essay will discuss this reason,
as well
as, the effects that this has on society.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents need to spend more
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time
at work than at home, which has made them choose to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one or two kids.
For instance
, a professor at The University of Sydney
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
that when he interviewed parents, 75 per cent of them said that they choose to have fewer
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children
as in this way they could spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
each of them. This could indicate that increased work
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time
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
home
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time
is a major reason for
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having
fewer children.

Having fewer
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children
has had
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positive
and
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negative
effects on society. In the
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positive
side, it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
global
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population
, which has a direct impact on the reduction of waste and global warming.
However
, in the
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negative
aspects, it may result in
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having
Use only "older" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more older
than younger
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population
. A city in Kansas is a
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clear
example of this
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negative
and
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positive
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effect
, since 1985
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people
decided to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one or no
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children
, this has resulted in a reduction of 50 percent of their waste production.
However
,
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now
most of their
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population
is over the age of 75 and there are not that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
younger
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people
to take care of them.

In conclusion
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that over the world
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many
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people
are opting for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
fewer
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children
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
consider that this is happening as parents have less available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to have bigger families. Although it has
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positive
effects on society such as reducing global
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population
, it
also
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects as no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
populations
.
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IELTS essay In many parts of the world, people are choosing to have fewer children. Why do you think this is happening? What impacts may it have on society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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