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In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. What do you think are the consequences of this?

In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. What do you think are the consequences of this? JMm5
Grandparents are fun to be with and they shower blessings and affection without wanting anything in return. Sadly in today’s world where large families are disintegrating into nuclear ones, children miss out on spending enough time with their grandparents and remain off limits from that sweet shower of love that they could have otherwise enjoyed from their grandparents. Spending little time grandparents can effect the growth of the child. Often parents don’t have time to spend with their children, in these cases, if one does not have the support of grandparents they tend to get mislead-ed in life. For instance, a child having no elder to tell the right and wrong is most likely to fall in trap of the wrong doers, often disturbing the life of an individual. Secondly, grandparents provide the love and care to the child, required to form a positive image of the society. A child living in the absence of grandparents has little or no awareness about the culture and the family traditions. This often leaves them to live in a void. Example, often parents even know less about the culture and stories of family, if a child misses out living with grandparents they often don’t get to know about their family members and the bond between the family is never strongly formed. Overall, in my opinion, grandparents provide the support and the care a child needs during the growing up days, missing out on which often leads them to live a life of void and deprived of the true meaning of family.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Grandparents
are fun to be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
with and
they shower blessings and affection without wanting anything in return.
Sadly
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world where large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are disintegrating into nuclear ones, children miss out on spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
and remain off limits from that sweet shower of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
that they could have
otherwise
enjoyed from their grandparents.

Spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
can effect the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Often
parents don’t have time to spend with their children, in these cases, if one does not have the support of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
they tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
mislead-ed in life.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
having no elder to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
is most likely to fall in trap of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
doers,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
disturbing the life of an individual.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
provide the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and care to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
, required to form a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
image of the society. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
living in the absence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
or no awareness about the culture and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
traditions. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a void. Example,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
parents even know less about the culture and stories of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
misses out living with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members and the bond between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is never
strongly
formed.

Overall
, in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
provide the support and the care a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
needs during the growing up days, missing out on which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
leads them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a life of void and deprived of the true meaning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
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IELTS essay In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. What do you think are the consequences of this?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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