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In many countries, sports and exercises classes are replaced with the academic subjects .what is your opinion . what are the effects on the children in their life?

In many countries, sports and exercises classes are replaced with the academic subjects. what is your opinion. what are the effects on the children in their life? KnybM
Since few years, academic knowledge is mushrooming by ever passing years. There are many countries that replaced sports and exercise classes with academic subjects. Apparently, this trends is leading towards myriad of besmirch consequences. I opine that it has negative effect on the children. First and foremost, sports and exercise help to develop and motivate to the children which is replaced with academic subject. To go deeper, nowadays children become inactive and lack of sense of humour because they donot have a physical activities, whichhelp to keep mind fresh and healthier. Due to the increase of academic subject they donot have enough time to played and doing exercise. moreover, parents force their children to get a higher marks and donot follow to play sports because they want their children fccus on their studies. Children will become disappointed sometimes their behaviour become rough. On the other hand, it increase the competition among the children They talk a lot of burden and this effect on their health. To illustrate, Dr. Sigmund Freud an eminent psychologist in his study of human behavior and cognitive skills has asserted that due ti increase of academic studies. children became dull and had lack of used their sense of humour. Considering the standpointing of the paragraph. In my opinion that it is important for child to play sports have helpful to developed their skills. I believe that they become more talented and energetic people. For instance, Mr Benajmin bradlee the editor of the Washington post in his editorial in 2002 January clearly stated that theyc become more talented people if they play sports and do excercise. To conclude, it can be said that although it has a important to learned the academic subject but it had also negative effect to the children on their life.
Since few years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge is mushrooming by ever passing years. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries that replaced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and exercise classes with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
Apparently
, this trends is leading towards myriad of besmirch consequences. I opine that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on the children.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and exercise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to develop and motivate to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
which
is replaced
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
. To go deeper, nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
inactive and lack of sense of
Possible spelling mistake. 'humour' is British English.
humour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
have a physical
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "activity"?
activities
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whichhelp
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
mind fresh and healthier. Due to the increase of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to played and doing exercise.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
moreover
, parents force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a higher marks and
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
follow to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Possible spelling mistake found.
fccus
on their studies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
disappointed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
rough.
On the other hand
, it
Did you mean "increases"?
increase
the competition among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
They talk
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
burden and this effect on their health. To illustrate, Dr. Sigmund Freud an eminent psychologist in his study of human behavior and cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
has asserted that due ti increase of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
studies.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
children
became dull and had lack of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
their sense of
Possible spelling mistake. 'humour' is British English.
humour
.

Considering the
Possible spelling mistake found.
standpointing
of the paragraph. In my opinion that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for child to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have helpful to developed their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. I believe that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
more talented and energetic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
For instance
, Mr
Possible spelling mistake found.
Benajmin
Possible spelling mistake found.
bradlee
the editor of the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Washington post
in his editorial in 2002 January
clearly
stated that
Possible spelling mistake found.
theyc
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
more talented
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
if they play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and do
Possible spelling mistake found.
excercise
.

To conclude
, it can
be said
that although it has
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Did you mean "to learn"?
to learned
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it had
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
on their life.
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IELTS essay In many countries, sports and exercises classes are replaced with the academic subjects. what is your opinion. what are the effects on the children in their life?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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