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In many countries senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this isn’t justified. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this isn’t justified. 82jm
In modern society, people tend to have higher wages when they are in high positions rather than general employees. Although some people argue that people who are in managerial positions are paid more than young workers are wrong, I believe that it can be justified for several reasons. Firstly, it is appropriate that executive officers earn more wages because they usually take responsibilities at the end of decisions. In many companies, tons of employees would complain that they are doing much more tasks and spending a bunch of time than their seniors. For example, ordinary workers in a company usually work around over 40 hours but executives would stay in their office less than that. However, most employees don't have responsibilities to determine the fate of companies. As they do not determine the final results, they don't need to be in charge of its failure as well. Their higher salaries are involved in all these responsibilities. In addition to that, high salaries are one of the functions that retaining skilled workers in a companies. For junior-level workers, higher wages can motivate them to work harder for promotions because this is a sigh of wealth. If they haven't seen any hope to be able to be better, ordinary workers would not have mind to improve their skills and status. In most people in communism, promoting is non-sense so they hardly try to upgrade their talent. In this respect, as companies give higher wages to senior employees, they can secure good skilled and talented workers in the future. In conclusion, in spite of an argument that high position workers make more money than general workers is unreasonable, I firmly believe that this is an appropriate treatment of their responsibilities about companies loss and perfect motivation to young people showing an optimistic future.
In modern society,
people
tend to have higher wages when they are in high positions
rather
than general
employees
. Although
some
people
argue that
people
who are in managerial positions
are paid
more than young
workers
are
wrong
, I believe that it can
be justified
for several reasons.

Firstly
, it is appropriate that executive officers earn more wages
because
they
usually
take responsibilities at the
end
of decisions. In
many
companies
, tons of
employees
would complain that they are doing much more tasks and spending a bunch of time than their seniors.
For example
, ordinary
workers
in a
company
usually
work around over 40 hours
but
executives would stay in their office less than that.
However
, most
employees
don't have responsibilities to determine the fate of
companies
. As they do not determine the final results, they don't need to be in charge of its failure
as well
. Their higher salaries
are involved
in all these responsibilities.

In addition
to that, high salaries are one of the functions that retaining skilled
workers
in a
companies
. For junior-level
workers
, higher wages can motivate them to work harder for promotions
because
this is a sigh of wealth. If they haven't
seen
any hope to be able to be better, ordinary
workers
would not have mind to
improve
their
skills
and status. In most
people
in communism, promoting is non-sense
so
they hardly try to upgrade their talent. In this respect, as
companies
give higher wages to senior
employees
, they can secure
good
skilled and talented
workers
in the future.

In
conclusion,
in spite of
an argument that high position
workers
make
more money than general
workers
is unreasonable, I
firmly
believe that this is an appropriate treatment of their responsibilities about
companies
loss and perfect motivation to young
people
showing an optimistic future.
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IELTS essay In many countries senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this isn’t justified.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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