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In many countries governments spend a lot of money on internet infrastructure. Some say it is reasonable to allocate these funds, but others disagree and say that many more important programs need this money.

In many countries governments spend a lot of money on internet infrastructure. Some say it is reasonable to allocate these funds, but others disagree and say that many more important programs need this money. 3YOPw
In plenty of countries the governments fund lots of money for developing internet infrastructure. Some people believe that there are some reasons for such expenses, whereas others think that this money should be spent more on other important programs. In the following essay I will describe both views and bring a relevant conclusion. First of all, there are several reasons for the government to finance the development of Internet infrastructure. For example, with the development of the Internet more and more services will become available via online. People can stay home and use all the required services via the Internet such as social networks, accomodation shops, or online travel tours. Another cause for the internet infrastructure to be financed is because it will facilitate the work of people working in technological professions. Take programmers and web-designers, as an example, who develop applications and improve their design with the aid of the Internet, so as to let people use everything online. However, there are such areas that are more essential for people than the Internet and should be financed. For instance, one of them is medicine. If the government subsidizes the medicine’s development, more people will make a speedy recovery and be healthier. Another point worth mentioning is education, the quality of which would rise significantly, so that more people would be qualified specialists in their job fields, if the government were to fund education to a higher extent. From my personal experience, the quality of the education gained in my country’s universities leaves much to be desired; however, being much funded, the education will make more students become qualified specialists in the market. Personally I support financing other importants life areas more than the internet, because they are less developed and make a higher contribution to society, than the Internet does. In conclusion, it is important for the government to spend money on internet infrastructure because of the appearance of online services and facilitation of technological jobs’ work. On the other hand, that money should be also spent on other fields of life such as medicine helping people and saving their lives, and education producing more job experts.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of countries the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
fund lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for developing internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
infrastructure
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons for such expenses, whereas others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
should
be spent
more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
programs. In the following essay I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
both views and bring a relevant conclusion.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, there are several reasons for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to finance the development of Internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
infrastructure
.
For example
, with the development of the Internet more and more services will become available via online.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can stay home and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
all the required services via the Internet such as social networks,
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodation
shops, or online travel tours. Another cause for the internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
infrastructure
to
be financed
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will facilitate the work of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
working in technological professions. Take programmers and web-designers, as an example, who develop applications and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their design with the aid of the Internet,
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
everything online.

However
, there are such areas that are more essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
than the Internet and should
be financed
.
For instance
, one of them is medicine. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
subsidizes the medicine’s development, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a speedy recovery and be healthier. Another point worth mentioning is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, the quality of which would rise
significantly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
be qualified
specialists in their job fields, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
were to fund
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to a higher extent. From my personal experience, the quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
gained in my country’s universities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
much to
be desired
;
however
, being much funded, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more students become qualified specialists in the market.

Personally
I support financing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Possible spelling mistake found.
importants
life areas more than the internet,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are less developed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a higher contribution to society, than the Internet does.

In conclusion
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
infrastructure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the appearance of online services and facilitation of technological jobs’ work. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
should be
also
spent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
fields of life such as medicine helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and saving their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
producing more job experts.
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IELTS essay In many countries governments spend a lot of money on internet infrastructure. Some say it is reasonable to allocate these funds, but others disagree and say that many more important programs need this money.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
358 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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