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in many countries children are getting fatter and less feat day by day problem and solution

in many countries children are getting fatter and less feat day by day problem and solution xPg0a
In contemporary era, all Nations face a one major problem and it is obesity while the proportion of that is increasing with time. Although the young generation also becomes fat day by day therefore, it is part and parcel to take some action on it. Let's discuss the causes of the problem and what measures should be taken to solve them. First and foremost, the technology developing in a rocket way however, it also forging numerous deplorable effect and increasing weight in one of them because, Nowadays, every student have electronic items therefore they play alternative games there hence, children do not prefer to do some outdoor activities: sports, exercise, cycling and many more due to that the level of calories incline and children suffered from the obesity. Another reason for it is unhealthy diet because, the young youth always want tasty food therefore, they prefer to eat snacks, fast food and oily product, and it is very injurious for fitness moreover, it also gives invitation for another disease related immunity system and heart due to that average life years declining in new generation. On the other hand, when authority is organise some events related fit as fiddle body then new generation get interest on it, and in result they follow it and become physically fit moreover, the educational centres also play a supreme role because, if there they learn new sports and importances of good health such as so many school writing on dialogue on board and it is ' the health is our real wealth'. Secondly, when government make some strict laws and rules that it will renders inordinate result for instance, in Japan National leader create some regulation related using computer and it is, the uses of a digital stuff is prohibited for the children who are under 15 years. To sum up, I want to say that, the physical fitness is our first priority because, it is door of success and in addition, it is grateful when parents teach young generation regarding the side effect of becomes fat.
In contemporary era, all Nations face a one major problem and it is obesity while the proportion of
that is
increasing with time. Although the young generation
also
becomes
fat
day by day
therefore
, it is part and parcel to take
some
action on it.
Let
's discuss the causes of the problem and what measures should
be taken
to solve them.
First
and foremost, the technology developing in a rocket way
however
, it
also
forging numerous deplorable effect and increasing weight in one of them
because
, Nowadays, every student have electronic items
therefore
they play alternative games there
hence
, children do not prefer to do
some
outdoor activities: sports, exercise, cycling and
many
more due to that the level of calories incline and children suffered from the obesity. Another reason for it is unhealthy diet
because
, the young youth always want tasty food
therefore
, they prefer to eat snacks,
fast
food and oily product, and it is
very
injurious for fitness
moreover
, it
also
gives invitation for another disease related immunity system and heart due to that average life years declining in new generation.
On the other hand
, when authority is
organise
some
events
related fit as fiddle body then new generation
get
interest on it, and in result they follow it and become
physically
fit
moreover
, the educational
centres
also
play a supreme role
because
, if
there they
learn new sports and
importances
of
good
health such as
so
many
school writing on dialogue on board and it is
'
the health is our real wealth'.
Secondly
, when
government
make
some
strict laws and
rules
that it will
renders
inordinate result
for instance
, in Japan National leader create
some
regulation related using computer and it is, the
uses
of a digital stuff
is prohibited
for the children who are under 15 years. To sum up, I want to say that, the physical fitness is our
first
priority
because
, it is door of success and
in addition
, it is grateful when parents teach young generation regarding the side effect of becomes
fat
.

IELTS essay in many countries children are getting fatter and less feat day by day problem and solution

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
342 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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