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In many countries, children are enagaged in some kind of paid work.do you agree or disagree with the statement.

In many countries, children are enagaged in some kind of paid work. 2ePX
Due to modern era, money is wey important for better lifestyle and good living standards. With the help of this people are able to buy their desired things and confort zone. In several nations, children have to work for wages and they are engaged with it. This essay will firmly accords the statement because they wants to self dependant as well as enhance their knowledge. To embark on the prominent reason behind my agreement is that children are engaged with paid works since they wants to be self dependant so, they are working earn money which is useful in their life. However, if they are able to fulfill their requirements they donot have to beg from someone else, they can easily buy things which they want. In addition to this, they become rich by hard work in their early age it is not beneficial only for them but also it will beneficial for their family. Moreover, it will direct effect on their education due to this they are able to afford their academic funds, which will helpfull in their future to find a good job as well as become successful. For instance, in the foreign countries children have to work from their age 18 along with their studies. It is commonly seen that they are more successful in their life as compared to which children who are not working and become burden on their parent's shoulders. Thus, this is the major reason behind my agreement. Apart from above maintained reasons there are another reason is that children are work for enhance their knowledge since, they are working in their early age they have more chances to gain information about different things. It will helpfull for them to find perfect job in their life because they have enough experience about business and work. Besides this, they are able to recognize the difference between good and bad also they can take right decisions about their life. A survey was conducted by Oxford university in 2004 observed that 70% children was working from their senior school which was proof helpfull to eran more money and improve their their living standards since all people are not born rich yet they become rich by hard work and enjoy the comfortable life. Therefore, it can be seen that working in early age will proofs beneficial in their life. To conclude, it can be deduced that in certain countries, children have to work and I completely agree with the phenomenon because they will become self dependant and they can enhance their knowledge.
Due to modern era, money is
Possible spelling mistake found.
wey
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for better lifestyle and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
living standards. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their desired things and
Possible spelling mistake found.
confort
zone. In several nations,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
wages and
they
are engaged
with it. This essay will
firmly
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "accord"
accords
the statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "want"
wants
to self
Possible spelling mistake found.
dependant
as well
as enhance their knowledge. To embark on the prominent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
behind my agreement is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are engaged
with paid works since they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "want"
wants
to be self
Possible spelling mistake found.
dependant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
earn money which is useful in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
, if they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to fulfill their requirements they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
beg from someone else, they can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things which they want.
In addition
to this, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
rich by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
it is not beneficial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
will beneficial
for their family.
Moreover
, it will direct effect on their education due to this they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to afford their academic funds, which will
Possible spelling mistake found.
helpfull
in their future to find a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
successful.
For instance
, in the foreign countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
18 along with their studies. It is
commonly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that they are more successful in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as compared to which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
burden on their parent's shoulders.
Thus
, this is the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
behind my agreement. Apart from above maintained
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
there are another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for enhance their knowledge since, they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in their early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
they have more chances to gain information about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things. It will
Possible spelling mistake found.
helpfull
for them to find perfect job in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
experience about business and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Besides
this, they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to recognize the difference between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
also
they can take right decisions about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. A survey
was conducted
by Oxford university in 2004 observed that 70%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from their senior school which was proof
Possible spelling mistake found.
helpfull
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
eran
more money and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
Possible typo: you repeated a word
their their
living standards since all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not born rich
yet
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
rich by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and enjoy the comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Therefore
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "proof"
proofs
beneficial in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
To conclude
, it can
be deduced
that in certain countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the phenomenon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
self
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
dependant and
they can enhance their knowledge.
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IELTS essay In many countries, children are enagaged in some kind of paid work.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
425 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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