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in many countries around the world, life expectancy is increasing advantage and disadvantage

in many countries around the world, life expectancy is increasing advantage and disadvantage JKR3E
Many wealthy countries are witnessing a rapid increase in life expectancy. This essay will depict the challenges of longevity and offer different actions to mitigate the consequences of this phenomenon. To begin with, the aging population poses some difficulties to society. First of all, old citizens are prone to physical health. Suffering from strokes or heart disease, elderly people are not capable of doing hard work for long periods. Secondly, the aging population increases the demand for social care costs. Therefore, governments should allocate more money for health care rather than any field of life. Finally, longevity results dramatically in economic growth. A rapid increase in the number of senior citizens leads to a shortage of qualified workers reducing productivity. To tackle this issue, various measures should be taken. The first solution may be creating jobs for the 60 or above. Experienced with different skills can pass on their younger counterparts. Therefore, old-aged workers can be financially dependent from the society. Second of all, young people should pay more attention to their parents. Consequently, this action will diminish the huge pressure of liberal health care. All in all, the aging population is posing various threatens to society especially the economic aspect. By creating more jobs and caring the elders, this phenomenon may be facilitate in the near future.
Many
wealthy countries are witnessing a rapid increase in life expectancy. This essay will depict the challenges of longevity and offer
different
actions to mitigate the consequences of this phenomenon.

To
begin
with, the aging population poses
some
difficulties to society.
First of all
,
old
citizens are prone to physical health. Suffering from strokes or heart disease, elderly
people
are not capable of doing
hard
work for long periods.
Secondly
, the aging population increases the demand for social care costs.
Therefore
,
governments
should allocate more money for health care
rather
than any field of life.
Finally
, longevity results
dramatically
in economic growth. A rapid increase in the number of senior citizens leads to a shortage of qualified workers reducing productivity.

To tackle this issue, various measures should
be taken
. The
first
solution may be creating jobs for the 60 or above. Experienced with
different
skills
can pass on their younger counterparts.
Therefore
,
old
-aged workers can be
financially
dependent from the society.

Second of all, young
people
should pay more attention to their parents.
Consequently
, this action will diminish the huge pressure of liberal health care.

All in all, the aging population is posing various threatens to society
especially
the economic aspect. By creating more jobs and caring the elders, this phenomenon may be
facilitate
in the near future.
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IELTS essay in many countries around the world, life expectancy is increasing advantage and disadvantage

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
218 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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