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IN CURRENT SOCIETY, MANY PEOPLE ARE STRUGGLING WITH OBESITY. WHAT IS THE MAIN CAUSE OF THIS? WHAT ARE THE EFFECTS?

IN CURRENT SOCIETY, MANY PEOPLE ARE STRUGGLING WITH OBESITY. WHAT IS THE MAIN CAUSE OF THIS? WHAT ARE THE EFFECTS? VyM86
In this globalized world, increase in cases of obesity has raised. Some people believe that this is cause mainly because of genetics or nature of adapting nutrients in body. However, I debunk from them and prefer that the main reason is consumption of unhealthy or improper diet. Sometimes parents are also responsible for such diseases. The paramount concrete reason is that children do not have control on their diet. They mostly consume street food which can cause diseases like obesity. A survey conducted by student of Harvard University states, mostly the teens who eat junk food has higher chances of obesity whereas such type of disease occurs at low rate to adult. Secondly, parents are also a reason for the same. They allow their children to eat unhealthy food number of times, because of this overeating it deteriorates there health. If this is stopped than the chances of obesity is lowered. On the contrary, the effects of obesity cause high risk to life. Problems like high blood pressure or heart attack is highly causable to patient suffering from obesity. Life of student suffering from such diseases is also affected because they are ashamed to go somewhere; the reason is they are being teased by other and this has negative impact on their life. Child is depressed and a feeling of an anxiety is roused. Weight loss, therapies or diet is the only solution for overcoming the diseases. Also opening of new restaurants, invention of new dishes has affected child health. To conclude, there are innumerable causes and effect of obesity. If the health of child is being cared from the young age than the chances is reduced. They should able to control themselves to stay away from obesity.
In this globalized world, increase in cases of obesity has raised.
Some
people
believe that this is
cause
mainly
because
of genetics or nature of adapting nutrients in body.
However
, I debunk from them and prefer that the main
reason
is consumption of unhealthy or improper diet.
Sometimes
parents are
also
responsible for such diseases.

The paramount concrete
reason
is that children do not have control on their diet. They
mostly
consume street food which can
cause
diseases
like obesity. A survey conducted by student of Harvard University states,
mostly
the teens who eat junk food has higher chances of obesity whereas such type of
disease
occurs at low rate to adult.
Secondly
, parents are
also
a
reason
for the same. They
allow
their children to eat unhealthy food number of times,
because of this
overeating it deteriorates there health.
If
this is
stopped
than the chances of obesity
is lowered
.

On the contrary
, the effects of obesity
cause
high
risk
to life. Problems like high blood pressure or heart attack is
highly
causable
to patient suffering from obesity. Life of student suffering from such
diseases
is
also
affected
because
they
are ashamed
to go somewhere; the
reason
is they are
being teased
by other and this has
negative
impact on their life. Child
is depressed
and a feeling of an anxiety
is roused
. Weight loss, therapies or diet is the
only
solution for overcoming the
diseases
.
Also
opening of new restaurants, invention of new dishes has
affected
child health.

To conclude
, there are innumerable
causes
and effect of obesity.
If
the health of child is
being cared
from the young age than the chances is
reduced
. They
should able
to control themselves to stay away from obesity.
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IELTS essay IN CURRENT SOCIETY, MANY PEOPLE ARE STRUGGLING WITH OBESITY. WHAT IS THE MAIN CAUSE OF THIS? WHAT ARE THE EFFECTS?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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