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If you were given an empty piece of land, would you rather use it to build a garden or a playground for children?

If you were given an empty piece of land, would you rather use it to build a garden or a playground for children? G3mMQ
In any case I would make a good decision about the garden or playground for children. I guess that playground will be better for children, because I think that playground brings children more cool emotions than garden. First of all, in a playground children can find new friends. Also on a playground children can communicate with other kids and develop their communication skills. In fact, the playground helps relieve stress. Kids can relax and have a great time with their friends.
In any case I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
decision about the garden or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. I guess that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
will be better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
more cool emotions than garden.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can find new friends.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can communicate with other kids and develop their communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. In fact, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playground
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
relieve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. Kids can relax and have a great time with their friends.
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IELTS essay If you were given an empty piece of land, would you rather use it to build a garden or a playground for children?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
81 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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