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IELTS Writing Task 2 Opinion essay These days there are many endangered species. Some people think it is a waste of money to protect them. Do you agree?

IELTS Writing Task 2 Opinion essay These days there are many endangered species. Some people think it is a waste of money to protect them. Do you agree? 8QLm5
These days, due to several reasons, the number of species that are on the verge of extinction is increasing. In my opinion, a sufficient amount of money should be spend in order to preserve them. In this essay I am going to prove my position with relevant points and examples. First of all, all species have their own part in food-chain. Unless a particular amount of finance is allocated to endangered species conservation, this chain is going to be broken which results in a number of problems. For example, the extinction of species that have the role of cleaning the surrounding can lead to the spread of different diseases. This, in fact, definately has affect on the life of people as well. Secondly, those species have always played a crucial role in pharmaceutical industry. Accordig to paper published in 2012, about 50% of drugs have correlation with natural resources. For instance, an experimental drug derived from saliva of venomous lizard has been proven to help people with type 2 diabetes by keeping levels of sugar in their blood at a stable rate. The extinction of those kinds of species would mean that new potential live saving drugs could be lost. In conclusion, I believe that each individual type of animals or plants have a role to play both in food-chain and drug production. Thus, it is critical that governments or society as a whole should do their best to protect those species.
These days, due to several reasons, the number of species that

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
are
on the verge of extinction is increasing. In my opinion, a

sufficient amount of money should be
Consider using the past participle "spent"?
spend
in order to preserve

them. In this essay I am going to prove my position
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
with


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
relevant
points and examples.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, all species have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
part in food-chain.

Unless a particular amount of finance
is allocated
to endangered

species conservation, this chain is going to
be broken
which

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
results
in a number of problems.
For example
, the extinction
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
of


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
species
that have the role of cleaning the surrounding can lead to

the spread of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
diseases. This, in fact,
Possible spelling mistake found.
definately


has
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on the life of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as well
.

Secondly
, those species have always played a crucial role in

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
pharmaceutical
industry.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Accordig
to paper published in 2012,

about 50% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
have correlation with natural resources. For

instance, an experimental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
derived from saliva of venomous

lizard has
been proven
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with type 2 diabetes by

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
keeping
levels of sugar in their blood at a stable rate. The

extinction of those kinds of species would mean that new

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
potential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
could
be lost
.

In conclusion
, I believe that each individual type of animals or plants

have a role to play both in food-chain and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
production.
Thus
, it is

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
critical
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
or society as a whole should do their best to

protect those species.
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IELTS essay IELTS Writing Task 2 Opinion essay These days there are many endangered species. Some people think it is a waste of money to protect them. Do you agree?

Essay
  American English
17 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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