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I young generation facing many problems which are related to their career that government ignoring their problems discuss problem and solution.

I young generation facing many problems which are related to their career that government ignoring their problems discuss problem and solution. Q8db1
Nowadays it is true that young generation facing problem which are related to their career job and other things however their problems are ignored by the authority I will discuss few problems while they facing problems and also discuss a number of solution of these problems in subsequent paragraphs. It is apparently seen that youth face major problems which affects on their future firstly there are a number of jewels who passed their studies but enables to get job according to their requirements under the influence of unemployment young generation commit crimes and gambling send you some illegal work for the solution of this problem that government should provide job opportunities for them and planning the rate of unemployment and the fact that young generation is the backbone of a country and future of our country. Moving further second problem is that in few countries are under poverty line because of poverty there are many people who do not afford higher education it is also a part of unemployment for the solution of this problem 30 should provide small amount of loans and scholarship to a the poor peoples furthermore last but not least problem is that corruption is increased day by day because of corruption many citizens are unable to get job and adult become drug addicts and robbery to fulfill their needs and the solution of this government should implement height charges and punish them who do this and cut the roots of corruption. To sum up young generation is a future of every country and society and then government should solve their problem and set of ignoring their problems the young generation faces many problems related to their future.
Nowadays it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
which
are related
to their career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and other things
however
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
by the authority I will discuss few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
while
Did you mean "they're facing", "they are facing", or "they were facing"?
they facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and
also
discuss a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in subsequent paragraphs. It is
apparently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that youth face major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
which affects on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
firstly
there are a number of jewels who passed their studies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
enables to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
according to their requirements under the influence of unemployment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation commit crimes and gambling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
illegal work for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities for them and planning the rate of unemployment and the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation is the backbone of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Moving
further
second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is that in few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are under poverty line
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of poverty there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who do not afford higher education it is
also
a part of unemployment for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
30 should provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
amount of loans and scholarship to
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "a" or "the" is left.
a the
poor peoples
furthermore
last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is that corruption
is increased
day by day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of corruption
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens are unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and adult become drug addicts and robbery to fulfill their needs and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should implement height charges and punish them who do this and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
the roots of corruption. To sum up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and society and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should solve their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
and set of ignoring their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation faces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
related to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
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IELTS essay I young generation facing many problems which are related to their career that government ignoring their problems discuss problem and solution.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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