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How have you contributed to solving a challenge to implementing change or reform?

How have you contributed to solving a challenge to implementing change or reform? k6ja8
This issue related to a client who executed a Foreign Exchange Spot deal (Buy USD 8, 252, 565/Sell IDR 120, 569, 986, 338) in 2020 by using the list of invoices as the underlying document. A client has the privilege to submit only the list of invoices at the latest on Spot’s value date. Besides, they responsible for administrating actual invoices when requested by the Bank. Firstly, I am responsible for performing a random sampling of the list of invoices and requiring actual invoices for the upcoming month as a control process. When I chose this client as a sample, I found mismatch data between a list of invoices and actual invoices as well as duplicate invoices. Secondly, I found that most of all the invoices already paid before Spot’s value date. As a result, the Bank was at risk fined 1% of the deal or a maximum IDR 1 billion from the regulator. To solve this issue, I led a Financial Markets Operation Team consisting of 5 people to communicate with the client to provide the appropriate underlying document. After further investigation, the root cause was a knowledge gap due to a client’s Treasury Team who provided invoices based in India. Hence, I took the initiative to work together with the team to educate the client and create a mini-guideline that summarizes Indonesia’s regulatory requirements. I also collaborated with the Relationship Manager Team to require them to revise the document. Furthermore, I proposed to the Compliance Team as a Risk Owner to reform the control process where clients who used a list of invoices must provide actual invoices at least on the Spot’s value date. Otherwise, the client’s deal will be unexecuted. Finally, my proposed action plan has been approved by the Compliance Team. I have successfully changed the existing control process and helped the Bank to mitigate the risk exposure. Also, after we educated the client, they have shown a clear understanding and complied with local regulatory requirements on the next transaction.
This issue related to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
who executed a Foreign Exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Spot
deal (
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Buy
USD 8, 252, 565/Sell IDR 120, 569, 986, 338) in 2020 by using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
list
of invoices as the underlying document. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
has the privilege to submit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
list
of invoices at the latest on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Spot’s
value date.
Besides
, they responsible for administrating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actual
invoices when requested by the Bank.

Firstly
, I am responsible for performing a random sampling of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
list
of invoices and requiring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actual
invoices for the upcoming month as a control process. When I chose this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
as a sample, I found mismatch data between a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
list
of invoices and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actual
invoices
as well
as duplicate invoices.
Secondly
, I found that most of all the invoices already paid
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Spot’s
value date.
As a result
, the Bank was at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
fined 1% of the deal or a maximum IDR 1 billion from the regulator.

To solve this issue, I led a Financial Markets Operation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
consisting of 5
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to communicate with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
to provide the appropriate underlying document. After
further
investigation, the root cause was a knowledge gap due to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client’s
Treasury
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
who provided invoices based in India.
Hence
, I took the initiative to work together with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
to educate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
and create a mini-guideline that summarizes Indonesia’s regulatory requirements. I
also
collaborated with the Relationship Manager
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
to require them to revise the document.
Furthermore
, I proposed to the Compliance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Risk
Owner to reform the control process where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clients
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
list
of invoices
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actual
invoices at least on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Spot’s
value date.
Otherwise
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client’s
deal will be
Possible spelling mistake found.
unexecuted
.

Finally
, my proposed action plan has
been approved
by the Compliance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
. I have
successfully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the existing control process and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
the Bank to mitigate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
exposure.
Also
, after we educated the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
, they have shown a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
understanding and complied with local regulatory requirements on the
next
transaction.
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IELTS essay How have you contributed to solving a challenge to implementing change or reform?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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