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How can literacy affect a persons social life?

How can literacy affect a persons social life? xD5Kg
The debate about the importance of literacy on social life has been going on for quite some time and I want to divide it into 2 categories. At the macro-level, Literacy and the ability of reading and writing, not only sets people up for communication but also can simulate the optimal patterns of participation and would strengthen their responsibilities and As a result, one would learn the importance of altruism. I believe at the micro-level, literacy is more important because as it affects social life, it also affects personal life. An illiterate person may have low- esteem to be a member of society, which caused Social avoidance. Therefore the one is dependent on others for much of their basic needs to participate and efficiently within communities. these people are susceptible to isolation, loneliness, and anxiety. In my point of view, this will create a catastrophic situation in long term.
The debate about the importance of literacy on social life has been going on for quite
some
time and I want to divide it into 2 categories. At the macro-level, Literacy and the ability of reading and writing, not
only
sets
people
up for communication
but
also
can simulate the optimal patterns of participation and would strengthen their responsibilities and
As a result
, one would learn the importance of altruism. I believe at the micro-level, literacy is more
important
because
as it affects social life, it
also
affects personal life. An illiterate person may have low- esteem to be a member of society, which caused Social avoidance.
Therefore
the one is dependent on others for much of their basic needs to participate and
efficiently
within communities.
these
people
are susceptible to isolation, loneliness, and anxiety. In my point of view, this will create a catastrophic situation in long term.
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IELTS essay How can literacy affect a persons social life?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
149 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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