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Health experts claim that walking is the best exercise. However, people are walking less on a daily basis. What has made this happen and how to deal with it?

Health experts claim that walking is the best exercise. However, people are walking less on a daily basis. What has made this happen and how to deal with it? xePQ
According to health physicians, it has been claimed that walking has remarkable effects on the body. Besides the benefits, people are still not able to cover daily steps due to their work pressure and packed schedules. This essay will illustrate the issue with the effective ways to manage time. The advantages of walking are undeniable, but due to the advancement of technology and to attain a perfect lifestyle an individual easily gets distracted by the daily responsibilities. This is to say that, earlier people use to travel a lot to get water for the family. Although now things are quite easily accessible to us. We just have to place an order online and with a click, everything is available to us. Moreover, our daily routines are packed enough with all the office work so this way we are not able to spend some time on ourselves. Walking should be part of our daily routine. We could use technology in other ways too. For instance, smartphones have apps, which examine our daily physical activities this way we could easily keep an eye on our movements. Secondly, the replacement of cars with walking to near by stores would help us to save petrol and improve our health. Also, waking up early as morning walks are more beneficial to our body. All in all, daily physical activity is crucial, therefore; minimizing the use of our cars and managing time would be the best solution to attain our goal.
According to health physicians, it has
been claimed
that walking has remarkable effects on the body.
Besides
the benefits,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
still
not able to cover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
steps due to their work pressure and packed schedules. This essay will illustrate the issue with the effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to manage time.

The advantages of walking are undeniable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to the advancement of technology and to attain a perfect lifestyle an individual
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
distracted by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
responsibilities. This is to say that, earlier
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to travel a lot to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
water for the family.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
things are quite
easily
accessible to us. We
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
place an order online and with a click, everything is available to us.
Moreover
, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
routines
are packed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
with all the office work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
we are not able to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time on ourselves.

Walking should be part of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
routine. We could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
technology in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
too.
For instance
, smartphones have apps, which examine our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
physical activities this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
we could
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
an eye on our movements.
Secondly
, the replacement of cars with walking to
Did you mean "nearby"?
near by
stores would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to save petrol and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our health.
Also
, waking up early as morning walks are more beneficial to our body.

All in all,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
physical activity is crucial,
therefore
; minimizing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of our cars and managing time would be the best solution to attain our goal.
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IELTS essay Health experts claim that walking is the best exercise. However, people are walking less on a daily basis. What has made this happen and how to deal with it?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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