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Government spend a lot amount of money on arts such as paintings and sculptures on public area,do you think is a good or bad use of money?why?

Government spend a lot amount of money on arts such as paintings and sculptures on public area, do you think is a good or bad use of money? why? b5LW
It is sometimes argued that expendituring earnings to arts have been increasing in local community. While, there are some benefits of arts, i believe that spending much money is necessary. On the one hand, art us a way to express ideas and communicate concepts in our routine. Firstly, art teaches people about their own culture and history Secondly, art encourages creativity and promotes harmony in society
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
argued that
Possible spelling mistake found.
expendituring
earnings to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
have been increasing in local community. While, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that spending much money is necessary. On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
us a way to express
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and communicate concepts in our routine.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
teaches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture and history
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
encourages creativity and promotes harmony in society

IELTS essay Government spend a lot amount of money on arts such as paintings and sculptures on public area, do you think is a good or bad use of money? why?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
65 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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