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Government should spend money on railways rather than roads

As our world is increasingly more modern, then people's demand on having decent technology is also skyrocketing. A number of future mode of transportation has been proposed and the ongoing suggestion for the Government is better off to build railways rather than roads. Personally speaking, I agree with this thought due to the fact that it would be beneficial in order to modernize our cities. Firstly, in a vast-changing world, replacing an obsolescent transportation and developing a future one would be an obligation for the Government owing to the fact that a number of advanced countries has started the similar project. Moreover, as population is exponentially growing then our cities are getting more crowded, in light of that keeping an obsolescent way of transportation system would actually bring more problems, such as traffic jam or increasing stress levels of its users. Consequently, an integrated mode of transportation is definitely essential, not only because it would reduce people's anxiety on the road as well as make their mobility more flexible. For instance, this type of transportation has been really prevalent in numerous European countries and from their experiences we could learn that modern transportation raised their level of awareness of punctuality and trained them to be more disciplined. Secondly, it would be more friendly to the environment in order to keep our environment intact, then the option is to build eco-friendly transportation and the primary candidate is railways, owing to the fact that it emits lesser chemical compound that could harm our environment compared to vehicles. For example, Japan as an advanced country has number of railways on the contrary they rarely have environmental problems causing by transportation. To conclude, railways as our main transportation would be more advantageous not only for humanity as well as for our environment.
As our world is
increasingly
more modern, then
people
's demand on having decent technology is
also
skyrocketing. A number of future mode of
transportation
has
been proposed
and the ongoing suggestion for the
Government
is better off to build
railways
rather
than roads.
Personally
speaking, I
agree
with this
thought
due to the fact that it would be beneficial in order to modernize our cities.

Firstly
, in a vast-changing world, replacing an obsolescent
transportation
and developing a future one would be an obligation for the
Government
owing to the fact that a number of advanced countries has
started
the similar project.
Moreover
, as population is
exponentially
growing then our cities are getting more crowded, in light of that keeping an obsolescent way of
transportation
system would actually bring more problems, such as traffic jam or increasing
stress
levels of its users.
Consequently
, an integrated mode of
transportation
is definitely essential, not
only
because
it would
reduce
people
's anxiety on the road
as well
as
make
their mobility more flexible.
For instance
, this type of
transportation
has been
really
prevalent in numerous European countries and from their experiences we could learn that modern
transportation
raised their level of awareness of punctuality and trained them to be more disciplined.

Secondly
, it would be more friendly to the
environment
in order to
keep
our
environment
intact, then the option is to build eco-friendly
transportation
and the primary candidate is
railways
, owing to the fact that it emits lesser chemical compound that could harm our
environment
compared to vehicles.
For example
, Japan as an advanced country has number of
railways
on the contrary
they rarely have environmental problems causing by transportation.

To conclude
,
railways
as our main
transportation
would be more advantageous not
only
for humanity
as well
as for our
environment
.
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IELTS essay Government should spend money on railways rather than roads

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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