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Government should spend money on rails rather than roads? To what extent do you agree or disagree

Government should spend money on rails rather than roads? 85agm
This days, rails and roads play a pivotal role in every person life. So, some people think that improving quality of rails is crucial, while others believe that is more important to invest in roads more than rails. This essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal conclusion. In one hand, there are a shocking number of reasons why many people strongly believe that is really crucial to spend more money in rails. First, decrease rate of pollution in cities. By that I mean that spend more money to improving quality of rails can encourage more people to use train to go school and work rather than privat transport, this consequently decrease carbon d’oxide in atmosphere by decreasing traffic in cities. To illustarte, A recent study by Queen’s University found that public transport can decrease rate of pollution by rate of 67 percent. To sum up, because of these factors it is clear that there are no doubt that spend more money in rail is benefical. On the other hand, there are a great deals of reasons why numerouse individuals think that government should invest more money in roads, First and foremost, investment into roads creat real economic benefits. To be more precise, the government which provide the majority of our roads infrastructure employee over 20. 000 per city. Who make direct positive economic impact on their community. For instance, The New York Times reported in March 2019 that investment in roads in United State help to augment economic by rate of 7 percent. As, a result of these aspects it is apparent that there are several benefits of spend more money in roads. In conclusion, after a careful analysis in both point view. Personally, I believe that the goverment should spend money in roads and rails equally, this balance have a lot of benefits.
It seems that a possessive apostrophe is missing.
This days
, rails and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
play a pivotal role in every person life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that improving quality of rails is crucial, while others believe
that is
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to invest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
more than rails. This essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal conclusion.

In one hand, there are a shocking number of reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
strongly
believe
that is
really
crucial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in rails.
First
, decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of pollution in cities. By that I mean that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to improving quality of rails can encourage more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
train to go school and work
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
privat
transport, this
consequently
decrease carbon d’oxide in atmosphere by decreasing traffic in cities. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
illustarte
, A recent study by Queen’s University found that public transport can decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of pollution by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of 67 percent. To sum up,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of these factors it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that there are no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefical
.

On the other hand
, there are a great deals of reasons why
Possible spelling mistake found.
numerouse
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should invest more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
,
First
and foremost, investment into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
Possible spelling mistake found.
creat
real economic benefits. To be more precise, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
which provide the majority of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
infrastructure employee over 20. 000 per city.
“Who” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
direct
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
economic impact on their community.
For instance
, The New York Times reported in March 2019 that investment in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
in United State
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to augment economic by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of 7 percent.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
, a result of these aspects it is apparent that there are several benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in roads.

In conclusion
, after a careful analysis in both point view.
Personally
, I believe that the
Possible spelling mistake found.
goverment
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and rails
equally
, this balance have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits.
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IELTS essay Government should spend money on rails rather than roads?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
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