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Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Government must invest this money in public services instead. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Some individuals tend to believe that, authorities not ought to be spending money on music, clubs and auditorium because it is totally worthlessly. Whereas, other people opine that, government must more funding allocate in public sectors. However, both has its merits. My inclination is justified in the forthcoming paragraphs. On the first place, first and foremost, looking at the present scenario, music industries and different types of theatre very essential because people can access and represent their talent by its. Secondly, not only for education has been escalating but different types of shows likes live concerts of music, dance, magizines, art exhibition painting are raise, hence it is very necessary to built up building for citizens. Moreover, civilization of arts and music can express our past culture so that it is very essential to alive of music industries. For instance, government of india, 58 croes rupees fund allocating in arts auditorium hall in delhi, so there many citizens has been demonstrate their talents. On the second places, in this contemporary era technology and modernization is rapidly increase in the world therefore government should be more money allocate in different types of public sectors like banking primary healthcare centre, education, sports and so on. Because of this, it is basic primary needs for citizens in their, day to day. If authorities built up more health car centre so public can easily use with low cost. Secondly, public transportation is also very need for human because many people can not afford person vehicles hence they can easily use it. For instance, 40% people in Ahmedabad, there are using BRTS bus because it is very cheaper rather other transport. To sum up, government should be money in both sectors. it is necessity for the teenagers and other citizens. But, authorities should right way to funding in different places, which can run easily by local people.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals tend to believe that, authorities not ought to be spending money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, clubs and auditorium
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
totally
worthlessly
. Whereas, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opine that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
more funding allocate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
sectors.
However
, both has its merits. My inclination
is justified
in the forthcoming paragraphs. On the
first
place,
first
and foremost, looking at the present scenario,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
industries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can access and represent their talent by its.
Secondly
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for education has been escalating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
likes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
concerts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, dance,
Possible spelling mistake found.
magizines
, art exhibition painting are raise,
hence
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary to built up building for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
Moreover
, civilization of arts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
can express our past culture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential to alive of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
industries.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
india
, 58
Possible spelling mistake found.
croes
rupees fund allocating in arts auditorium hall in
Possible spelling mistake found.
delhi
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
has been
Consider using a past participle here: "demonstrated".
demonstrate
their talents. On the second places, in this contemporary era technology and modernization is
rapidly
Consider using a past participle here: "increased".
increase
in the world
therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should be more money allocate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
sectors like banking primary healthcare
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
, education, sports and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Because of this
, it is basic primary needs for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
in their, day to day.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
authorities built up more health car
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
with low cost.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
need for human
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can not afford person vehicles
hence
they can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it.
For instance
, 40%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in Ahmedabad, there are using
Possible spelling mistake found.
BRTS
bus
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
cheaper
rather
other transport. To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should be money in both sectors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is necessity for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, authorities should right way to funding in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
places, which can run
easily
by local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Government must invest this money in public services instead. with this statement.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
312 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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