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Government funding should only provide scholarships for best students. All other funding should come from student fees and private organisations. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Government funding should only provide scholarships for best students. All other funding should come from student fees and private organisations. v. 1
The advancement in technology has altered the way people connect to each other over the past years. This essay will discuss how people form bonds with other people around the world through telecommunication. This essay will also state the benefits that people acquired for this development. The power of communication technology has become the smartest and easiest way to reach anyone to every corner of the globe. It enabled people to connect easier, faster, and more convenient. Moreover, it made it possible for everyone to stay connected with their friends, relatives and for businesses as well regardless of their location with the help of social media applications. For example, the invention of an application called Skype wherein it has features like video calling and exchanging of messages and photos that allows people to socialize and get updates to anyone they wanted to. This technological development has been considered a tremendous impact on the history of human kind which provided numerous benefits. Firstly, with the current technology, one of its main advantages is that people are able to reach out with other people in a matter of seconds. It made the world closer, making communication across long distance easier. Secondly, nowadays, people can now work whenever they are as long as they are logged into the internet. This is very handy, especially to businesses that have clients overseas whereas they can make live meetings and discussions through online networks like LinkedIn. In conclusion, communication technology is extensively being used by everyone and it transformed how people network with each other. This advancement in technology in the mode of communication paved way to the development of fast communication and I firmly believe that this has been a positive development as it aid in eliminating communication barriers.
The advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has altered the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
connect to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
over the past years. This essay will discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
form bonds with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around the world through telecommunication. This essay will
also
state the benefits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
acquired for this development.

The power of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has become the smartest and easiest way to reach anyone to every corner of the globe. It enabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to connect easier, faster, and more convenient.
Moreover
, it made it possible for everyone to stay connected with their friends, relatives and for businesses
as well
regardless of their location with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of social media applications.
For example
, the invention of an application called Skype wherein it has features like video calling and exchanging of messages and photos that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to socialize and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
updates to anyone they wanted to.

This technological development has
been considered
a tremendous impact on the history of human kind which provided numerous benefits.
Firstly
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, one of its main advantages is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to reach out with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a matter of seconds. It made the world closer, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
across long distance easier.
Secondly
, nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
work whenever they are as long as they
are logged
into the internet. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
handy,
especially
to businesses that have clients overseas whereas they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
meetings and discussions through online networks like LinkedIn.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is
extensively
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by everyone and it transformed how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
network with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. This advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in the mode of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
paved way to the development of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
and I
firmly
believe that this has been a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development as it aid in eliminating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
barriers.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Government funding should only provide scholarships for best students. All other funding should come from student fees and private organisations. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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