Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand and what measure could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem? v.12

Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand and what measure could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem? v. 12
It is undeniable that water scarcity is becoming a worldwide problem. The growth of population is the main reason for this alarming trend, but some measures could be taken to tackle this predicament. One the one hand, the pressure of the growing population on water resources could lead to the shortage of it. Increase number of population lead to an increased water demand in three sectors namely Agriculture, Industry and households. Firstly, from an agricultural perspective, irrigation consumes a large amount of water. Also, Agricultural industry could pollute the rest of the water by chemical compounds that used in farming like pesticides. Secondly, the industries and factories use a huge amount of water in their process. For instance, some research revealed that meat processing industry could be the main cause of water shortage in some regions of the UK. Finally, water used for household purposes could be another consequence of growth number of population and ultimately could lead to water demand. On the other hand, there are two main solutions to solve the problems described above. One solution is that water recycling could play an important role in water conservation. Governments should build new water pipes system for recycling and should encourage people to use recycled water. Another solution is to remove salts from sea water to enable people to use it. This process called desalination. It is now used in many countries like the USA and achieved their goal. In conclusion, water demand is a global problem caused mainly by the growth of population number and governments and people should be cooperated to solve this issue.
It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
scarcity is becoming a worldwide problem. The growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is the main reason for this alarming trend,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures could
be taken
to tackle this predicament.

Did you mean "on"?
One
the one hand, the pressure of the growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
resources could lead to the shortage of it. Increase number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
lead to an increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
demand in three sectors
namely
Agriculture,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industry
and households.
Firstly
, from an agricultural perspective, irrigation consumes a large amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
Also
, Agricultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
could pollute the rest of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
by chemical compounds that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in farming like pesticides.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
and factories
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
in their process.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
research revealed that meat processing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
could be the main cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
shortage in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regions of the UK.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for household purposes could be another consequence of growth number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and
ultimately
could lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
demand.

On the other hand
, there are two main solutions to solve the problems
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
above. One solution is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
recycling could play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
conservation.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
should build new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
pipes system for recycling and should encourage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
recycled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. Another solution is to remove salts from sea
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to enable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it. This process called desalination. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries like the USA and achieved their goal.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
demand is a global problem caused
mainly
by the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
number and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
be cooperated
to solve this issue.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand and what measure could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem? v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts