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For some people a high salary is the most important criterion when choosing a new job while others are satisfied if the job contributes to society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

For some people a high salary is the most important criterion when choosing a new job while others are satisfied if the job contributes to society. 9Y9Mr
There is a common belief that the people are preferring to get high wages while they are finding their jobs rather than, other people satisfies with their jobs by supporting communities. This essay will discuss the arguments related to the job satisfaction with suitable examples. There is a high priority for the salaries among the people while they are searching for work. In other words, the employees are working hard in a particular firm on the contrary, not earning enough income they desire and this leads them towards the dissatisfaction of the job. I agree with this statement due to the fact that, the staff will be motivated while working when they are paid more than their expectation consequently, that the numerous people are concerned about their earnings while they are finding jobs. A recent study found that the 45% of the people prefer either minimum Rs. 15, 000 salary in the field of engineering or they will not work properly with enthusiastic. In other words, people believes that job satisfaction comes by helping others. Means that, numerous communities think that by supporting others and increasing economy is the main factor for the job satisfaction, in this sector people highly focus on how much they are contributing in the society for their development. I oppose with this statement due to the fact that when the people are helping others which will improve the society although, the employee’s lifestyle remains the same due to the lack of desired incentives. A recent survey of the BBC news found that in 2017 social workers in the United Kingdom are dissatisfy due to the lack of their increasing salaries. In conclusion, people mostly prefer to get high wages while they are searching jobs for themselves and this will also help them to rise their motivation while they are working however, the employees helping the society will also feel dissatisfied by their job, due to the lack of improvement in their own life.
There is a common belief that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
The verb 'preferring' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are preferring
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high wages while they are finding their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
rather
than,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
satisfies
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
by supporting communities. This essay will discuss the arguments related to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
satisfaction with suitable examples.

There is a high priority for the salaries among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
while they are searching for work. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, the employees are working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in a particular firm
on the contrary
, not earning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
income they desire and this leads them towards the dissatisfaction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the fact that, the staff will
be motivated
while working when they
are paid
more than their expectation
consequently
, that the numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are concerned
about their earnings while they are finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. A recent study found that the 45% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer either minimum Rs. 15, 000 salary in the field of
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
engineering or
they will not work
properly
with enthusiastic.

In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
believes
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
satisfaction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
by helping others. Means that, numerous communities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that by supporting others and increasing economy is the main factor for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
satisfaction, in this sector
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
highly
focus on how much they are contributing in the society for their development. I oppose with this statement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the fact that when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are helping others which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the society although, the employee’s lifestyle remains the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the lack of desired incentives. A recent survey of the BBC news found that in 2017 social workers in the United Kingdom are
Consider using a past participle here: "dissatisfied".
dissatisfy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the lack of their increasing salaries.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
mostly
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high wages while they are searching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for themselves and this will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to rise their motivation while they are working
however
, the employees helping the society will
also
feel dissatisfied by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the lack of improvement in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
life.
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IELTS essay For some people a high salary is the most important criterion when choosing a new job while others are satisfied if the job contributes to society.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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