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Feedback and evaluation are necessary aspects of school and work, but many people dislike being evaluated. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v.1

Feedback and evaluation are necessary aspects of school and work, but many people dislike being evaluated. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 1
In the salad days of the millennium, providing reviews and access reports is pivotal in both work and school. However, myriads of people think that it is not good to being evaluated. Feedback and evaluation correct and better the things which is not perfect. In this following paragraph, we would elucidate some plausible reasons that why people disagree for evaluation and also propose a handful of remedial measures. To commence with the reasons, we have a lot of things in this matter. Firstly, numerous of people believe that the assessment report de-motivate them. They think the reviews on their job or in education discourage them if it shows negative views. Thus, they do not prefer remarks on their industry. Secondly, some people are overconfident about their job. Therefore, they suggest that whatever they do that is right and do not want that other human demean them by their results. I would like to quote an epitome that a research conducted by the Hindustan newspaper regarding the issue why people feels insecure about their assessment then result shows that masses are not comfortable as they feels by giving feedback on their task means that others notice negative points in them. Undoubtedly, every lock has a key! similarly, some solutions should be implemented. People feel comfortable if the individual who asses the report, provide result in a manner such as without using harsh words. In the office or at job time give the reviews at that time when a human is alone rather than between teams or groups as they feel insulted. Furthermore, provide feedback with the some guidance or correction so masses feel comfortable. To recapitulate, I would like to infer that both individual and the individual who give feedback, both go hand in had whether it is at the workplace or in school in order to curb the menace. They should forward their foot together for diminishing the problem.
In the salad days of the millennium, providing reviews and access reports is pivotal in both work and school.
However
, myriads of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
Did you mean "be"?
being
evaluated.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Feedback
and evaluation correct and better the things which is not perfect. In this following paragraph, we would elucidate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
plausible reasons that why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
disagree for evaluation and
also
propose a handful of remedial measures.

To commence with the reasons, we have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things in this matter.
Firstly
, numerous of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the assessment report
Possible spelling mistake found.
de-motivate
them. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the reviews on their job or in education discourage them if it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
views.
Thus
, they do not prefer remarks on their industry.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are overconfident about their job.
Therefore
, they suggest that whatever they do
that is
right and do not want that other human demean them by their results. I would like to quote an epitome that
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
conducted by the Hindustan newspaper regarding the issue why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
feels
insecure about their assessment then result
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that masses are not comfortable as they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "feel"
feels
by giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feedback
on their task means that others notice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
points in them.

Undoubtedly
, every lock has a key!
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
similarly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions should
be implemented
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
comfortable if the individual who asses the report, provide result in a manner such as without using harsh words. In the office or at job time give the reviews at that time when a human is alone
rather
than between teams or groups as they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
insulted.
Furthermore
, provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feedback
with the
Did you mean "same"?
some
guidance or correction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
comfortable.

To recapitulate, I would like to infer that both individual and the individual who give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feedback
, both go hand in had whether it is at the workplace or in school in order to curb the menace. They should forward their foot together for diminishing the problem.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Feedback and evaluation are necessary aspects of school and work, but many people dislike being evaluated. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
319 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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