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Family time verses career development

Family time verses career development VweQK
Opinions differ from various people on time taken building a successful profession and the moments they spend with family and friends. While it is more important to have productive lifetime and build astable income, family and friends are important to spend time with in my opinion. Firstly, it is highly recommended to make a career that is stable to make life easier and provide personal and family needs. When one plans to start afamily, it is necessary to have the means of providing for the basic needs like food, shelter and clothing. In addition, other needs like medical, education among others can only be provided if the provider has source of income which makes it happier for the small community in ehich they live in. However, family and friends are important part of persons lively hood, its less compared to successful career. Afamily brought up by someone able yo provide for their needs is likely to grow and access their personal needs. Wherever there are two families, it is likely to achieve healthy living where professional is a member of their family as compared to when one is present but has limited resources to share with them. In conclusion, it is comfortable to live in a family with access to basic and advance needs contrary to when the family spends time together but with limited resources to share. It is therefore better to spent more time building a career and spend little less but quality time with family and friends.
Opinions differ from various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
taken building a successful profession and the moments they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. While it is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to have productive lifetime and build
Possible spelling mistake found.
astable
income,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with in my opinion.

Firstly
, it is
highly
recommended to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a career
that is
stable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
life easier and provide personal and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
. When one plans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
Possible spelling mistake found.
afamily
, it is necessary to have the means of providing for the basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
like food, shelter and clothing.
In addition
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
like medical, education among others can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be provided
if the provider has source of income which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it happier for the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
community in
Possible spelling mistake found.
ehich
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of persons lively hood, its less compared to successful career.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Afamily
brought up by someone able
Did you mean "to", "you" or "your"?
yo
provide for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
is likely to grow and access their personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
. Wherever there are two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
, it is likely to achieve healthy living where professional is a member of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
as compared to when one is present
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
has limited resources to share with them.

In conclusion
, it is comfortable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
with access to basic and advance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
contrary to when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with limited resources to share. It is
therefore
better to spent more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
building a career and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
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IELTS essay Family time verses career development

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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