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family that have many children

family that have many children xOEla
It is true that in the past, families tended to be larger than they nowadays because people had more children. From my standpoint, there were both benefits and drawbacks about this issue. In the first place, there were some disadvantages of being a part of a large family. To begin with, household finances were the most enormous problem they had to face up with. In case that some families were rich, that was not a big deal, but with a poor family, it was a really serious problem. Because there were many members live in the house, the amount of money that the parents had to pay for living increased significantly. Next, having many children led to the fact that the homemaker could be really busy, because she had to do all the housework as well as looked after the kids. In addition, the house also did not have enough rooms for all the children, so they had to share rooms together. For this reason, it meant that the kids didn’t have their own space for personal interest. An inevitable thing that would turn up regularly between each member was the arguments. Therefore, the family would have a negative atmosphere. Finally, the last disadvantage of being a part of a large family was the children were not loved equally.
It is true that in the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
tended to be larger than they nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. From my standpoint, there were both benefits and drawbacks about this issue.

In the
first
place, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages of being a part of a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, household finances were the most enormous problem they had to face up with. In case that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
were rich, that was not a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
deal,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with a poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, it was a
really
serious problem.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
members
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, the amount of money that the parents had to pay for living increased
significantly
.
Next
, having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
led to the fact that the homemaker could be
really
busy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she had to do all the housework
as well
as looked after the kids.
In addition
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
also
did not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
rooms for all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they had to share rooms together.
For this reason
, it meant that the kids didn’t have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
space for personal interest. An inevitable thing that would turn up
regularly
between each member was the arguments.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
would have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
atmosphere.
Finally
, the last disadvantage of being a part of a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
was the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
were not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
equally
.
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IELTS essay family that have many children

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
219 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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