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Extereme sports are dangerous and should be banned

Extereme sports are dangerous and should be banned D68Pm
The author denies the idea that extreme sports can put athletes at too much risk. The fact is having an accident while doing sports is unavoidable; however, most risks decrease by setting understandable and safe procedures and rules. Moreover, Sports have been becoming more secured due to advancing the security and technology of their equipment. Although establishing reliable and safe guidance for sports is essential, stopping people from performing them is mistaken and difficult. If we are aware of extreme sports' consequences, the right to exercise should remain ours. In addition, most dangerous sports are executed somewhere remote that has no law enforcement.
The author denies the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can put athletes at too much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
. The fact is having an accident while doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is unavoidable;
however
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
decrease by setting understandable and safe procedures and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
have been becoming more secured due to advancing the security and technology of their equipment.

Although establishing reliable and safe guidance for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is essential, stopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from performing them
is mistaken
and difficult. If we are aware of extreme sports' consequences, the right to exercise should remain ours.
In addition
, most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are executed
somewhere remote that has no law enforcement.

IELTS essay Extereme sports are dangerous and should be banned

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
103 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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