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Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet Do you agree or disagree v.2

Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet v. 2
Many people think that vegetarian is healthier for those who prefer eating vegetables rather than meat. While I agree with this view, I believe that people should have meat in every their meals in order to have a good health. On the one hand, There are several reasons why vegetarian benefits for human body. Firstly, scientists have proven that vegetarians have a lower risk of illnesses such as heart disease, diabetes, obesity and some forms of cancers. This is due to the fact that a healthy vegetarian diet is basically low in fat and high in fibre. Secondly, vegetables bring a wider range of nutritional needs for vegetarians. For example, raw spinach probably provides a source of vitamins such as vitamin A, E as well as by far calciums. Hence, instead of eating much meat so as to absorb these vitamins, we just need a bowl of raw spinach. On the other hand, vegetarians are likely to face some difficulties if they do not eat meat. One of the difficulties is that individuals have to pay attention to choose the correct balance of vegetarian food not meet energy needs. If they are in a wrong way of choosing types of vegetables, this may lead to a malnutrition. Another difficulty is that vegetarian might have to change their cooking methods and habits as well. For instance, food which is eaten raw, steamed or stir-fried obtains much more minerals than that is boiled in water and deep-fried. Thus, traditional cooking methods in Vietnam should be rather applied for vegetarians. Those using western cooking method will have to change the cooking style or adopt a non-vegetarian diet. In conclusion, although vegetarian has a positive effect our health, not everyone meets vegetarian diet. Therefore, they should be careful in selecting vegetarian foods.
Many
people
think
that vegetarian is healthier for those who prefer eating vegetables
rather
than
meat
. While I
agree
with this view, I believe that
people
should have
meat
in
every their meals
in order to have a
good
health.

On the one hand, There are several reasons why vegetarian benefits for human body.
Firstly
, scientists have proven that vegetarians have a lower
risk
of illnesses such as heart disease, diabetes, obesity and
some
forms of cancers.
This is due to the fact that
a healthy vegetarian diet is
basically
low in
fat
and high in
fibre
.
Secondly
, vegetables bring a wider range of nutritional needs for vegetarians.
For example
, raw spinach
probably
provides a source of vitamins such as vitamin A, E
as well
as by far
calciums
.
Hence
,
instead
of eating much
meat
so as to
absorb these vitamins, we
just
need a bowl of raw spinach.

On the other hand
, vegetarians are likely to face
some
difficulties if they do not eat
meat
. One of the difficulties is that individuals
have to
pay attention to choose the correct balance of vegetarian food not
meet
energy needs. If they are in a
wrong
way of choosing types of vegetables, this may lead to a malnutrition. Another difficulty is that vegetarian might
have to
change
their cooking methods and habits
as well
.
For instance
, food which
is eaten
raw, steamed or stir-fried obtains much more minerals than that
is boiled
in water and deep-fried.
Thus
, traditional cooking methods in Vietnam should be
rather
applied for vegetarians. Those using western cooking method will
have to
change
the cooking style or adopt a non-vegetarian diet.

In conclusion
, although vegetarian has a
positive
effect our health, not everyone meets vegetarian diet.
Therefore
, they should be careful in selecting vegetarian foods.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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