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even salaries policy between people

even salaries policy between people 6Lq3j
While some people see that the minority of the people who receives drastically high income is good for societies, others argue that it has many drawbacks and governments have to limit their pension. Personally, I reckon that rewarding people with unlimited salaries has positive consequences on countries in term of increasing competition and gaining much tax. On the one hand, due to extraordinary efforts that people with unrestricted salaries make, many people believe that it's a legitimate right for any diligent persons. Once the government allows people to have fixed income, this would force people to be lethargic. In contrast, as people feel that their effort is esteemed, this extracts their best; therefore, country's thrive is inevitable. Furthermore, because tax system in many countries is accumulated, the higher you earn the higher tax you pay, numerous people encourage free-salaries policy. As the tax is employed for public service, the return of high pensions would be reflected at needy and destitute people. On the second hand, in spite of the many advantages of raised salaries, some still conservative about this issue and see it's illogical. Their claim stems from the fact that all are human being, and no one has exceptional abilities which makes him eligible for higher incentives. For instance, even people who makes efforts which many consider meaningless deserves to live in a dignity and respect. Once some receive raised income, this would be reflected on others whom will receive reduced value. Furthermore, as satisfaction plays a vital role in social safety and peace, this category of people see that plethora of people would feel oppressed in case they received unfair income; therefore, crime can't be inhibited unless justice was applied between people. However, I believe that individuals have to be assessed based on their results not their physical efforts, and people have to admire others' achievements. Also, many affluence countries suffer from offences while almost all of its people live a wealth. Thus, offering even income is meaningless. In conclusion, although many people encourage the idea of high income, some still reluctant to this perspective. personally, I think that, the higher the person gain, the more competitor he would be and the more affluence community will result.
While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the minority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who receives
drastically
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for societies, others argue that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drawbacks and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
limit their pension.
Personally
, I reckon that rewarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with unlimited salaries has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
consequences on countries in term of increasing competition and gaining much tax.

On the one hand, due to extraordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with unrestricted salaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it's a legitimate right for any diligent persons. Once the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
, this would force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be lethargic.
In contrast
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effort
is esteemed
, this extracts their best;
therefore
,
Consider using the plural form here: "countrys".
country's
thrive is inevitable.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
tax system in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
is accumulated
, the higher you earn the higher tax you pay, numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
encourage free-salaries policy. As the tax
is employed
for public service, the return of high pensions would
be reflected
at needy and destitute
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the second hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages of raised salaries,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
still
conservative about this issue and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it's illogical. Their claim stems from the fact that all are human being, and no one has exceptional abilities which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
him eligible for higher incentives.
For instance
, even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
Did you mean "make"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
consider meaningless deserves to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a dignity and respect. Once
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
receive raised
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
, this would
be reflected
on others whom will receive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
value.
Furthermore
, as satisfaction plays a vital role in social safety and peace, this category of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would feel oppressed in case they received unfair
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
;
therefore
, crime can't
be inhibited
unless justice
was applied
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
, I believe that individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be assessed
based on their results not their physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
admire others' achievements.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
affluence countries suffer from
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
while almost all of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a wealth.
Thus
, offering even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
is meaningless.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
encourage the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
still
reluctant to this perspective.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, the higher the person gain, the more competitor he would be and the more affluence community will result.
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IELTS essay even salaries policy between people

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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