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Essay topics: if people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should get it right away rather than waiting for satisfying jobs?

Essay topics: if people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should get it right away rather than waiting for satisfying jobs? AjQbw
Since the beginning of the current century, the concept of choosing a career has been brought to public attention. Some people believe that they should wait for a satisfying job; however, there is a substantial body of evidence that casts doubts in this belief. From a personal perspective, it is better for people to get a secure job rather than waiting for their dreamed ones, given that working has a crucial impact on people's experience, skills and financial situations. The first and foremost point provided that people start to work, they could boost their skills. For instance, in California, there are plenty of people came from developing countries, such as Egypt, Indonesia and China, hoping for a better life. These people who immigrated should start work any opportunity not only to earn money; but also, to improve their personality. To put it in another way, working helps immigrating people to explore cultures and gain a variety of skills, such as language, social skill. Consequently, having a job is imperative. Next, coupled with skills enhancement, experience is another benefit of having a job. For example, technological engineers in Silicon Valley start their practical life by working as employees in teamwork, by the time they could gain experience and promote to manager positions. Furthermore, they could add this experience to their resumes, which could help them to get better jobs with better salaries. To that end, they could pull up their future with a lot of thrives and prosperity. Therefore, getting a job could be a forward step to the dreamed one. Ultimately, life has become so expensive, thereby working is not optional anymore. A survey conducted by the National Association of Finance in California found that prices of rents and houses have been increased dramatically in the last three decades, which put people under severe pressure to work more hours to earn money. Given that the high cost of living, people could not afford to live without working. As a result, having a secure job is essential. Taking everything into consideration; without a doubt, getting a secure job is more beneficial than waiting for a satisfied one. It is suggested that people compromise to achieve satisfy/secure career balance.
Since the beginning of the
current
century, the concept of choosing a career has
been brought
to public attention.
Some
people
believe that they should wait for a satisfying
job
;
however
, there is a substantial body of evidence that casts doubts in this belief. From a personal perspective, it is
better
for
people
to
get
a secure
job
rather
than waiting for their dreamed ones,
given
that
working
has a crucial impact on
people
's
experience
,
skills
and financial situations.

The
first
and foremost point provided that
people
start
to work, they could boost their
skills
.
For instance
, in California, there are
plenty
of
people
came from
developing countries
, such as Egypt, Indonesia and China, hoping for a
better
life. These
people
who immigrated should
start
work any opportunity not
only
to earn money;
but
also
, to
improve
their personality. To put it in another way,
working
helps
immigrating
people
to explore cultures and gain a variety of
skills
, such as language, social
skill
.
Consequently
, having a
job
is imperative.

Next
, coupled with
skills
enhancement,
experience
is another benefit of having a
job
.
For example
, technological engineers in Silicon Valley
start
their practical life by
working
as employees in teamwork, by the time they could gain
experience
and promote to manager positions.
Furthermore
, they could
add
this
experience
to their resumes, which could
help
them to
get
better
jobs
with
better
salaries. To that
end
, they could pull up their future with
a lot of
thrives and prosperity.
Therefore
, getting a
job
could be a forward step to the dreamed one.

Ultimately
, life has become
so
expensive, thereby
working
is not optional anymore. A survey conducted by the National Association of Finance in California found that prices of rents and
houses
have
been increased
dramatically
in the last three decades, which put
people
under severe pressure to work more hours to earn money.
Given
that the high cost of living,
people
could not afford to
live
without
working
.
As a result
, having a secure
job
is essential.

Taking everything into consideration; without a doubt, getting a secure
job
is more beneficial than waiting for a satisfied one. It
is suggested
that
people
compromise to achieve satisfy/secure career balance.
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IELTS essay Essay topics: if people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should get it right away rather than waiting for satisfying jobs?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
367 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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