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Enjoyable mountain trip I have had

Enjoyable mountain trip I have had GJ2we
During previous weeks, I had nothing special to do. I connected to my friends and planned to go to a mountain trip. This intriguing event did move my lethargy away. It wasn't our first experience but purely second. So, I had a bit excitement to go to the "Lon Jia", such an immense mountain with high slopes. We arrived at mountain base at about 6: 30 in the beautiful morning. I was glad because of the weather. I would be so disappointed if it were such a bleak. The sun was there but just as a tomato. Because of this, our climbing spirit were so fresh and active. We started eagerly at the beginning but it wasn't last so long. To be exact, we were gasping after passing the first turn of the tenth. We utterly did lots of warmups definitely. I thought it wasn't covered enough. It would be such a hell if the sun shone brightly at that time. Half of our snacks were gone after reaching to the third hill. We can't even image how we got to the top. Fortunately, there were such a long horde both to the way up and down. We could ask some help due to the fact that we had drank all of the water we brought along. I thought my mussels couldn't squeeze a single times more, and I was ready to surrender at 3/4 of the length. At that time, all I knew was I am so thirsty and I want to sleep as I consumed all of my energy. We did a long rest as we have had oceans of time to reach at the tip, and we already had planned to sleep there. In no longer time, we reached to the end. I was huffing and puffing. I glimpsed my guys, and they were the same as I did. As soon as arrived, we took a quick bath and had our late lunches. To describe the feeling of seeing everything from the top is totally excellent. To illustrate, there was nothing above us and the liberating ripple of cool breeze had already taken our heat away. We took thousands of photos and came back home at next morning. Unfortunately, came back home was under the downpour. It has been linking in my mind. I will make a plan to go there again without a doubt. All you have to do is lots of warmups before climbing and training for a week to make sure before the trip. Don't forget to take enough snacks and drinks. I had a climb, but the view was great.
During previous weeks, I had nothing special to do. I connected to my friends and planned to go to a mountain trip. This intriguing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
did
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
my lethargy away. It wasn't our
first
experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
purely
second.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I had a
It seems that there's a missing preposition after ''.
bit
excitement to go to the
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Lon
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jia
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, such an immense mountain with high slopes. We arrived at mountain base at about 6: 30 in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
morning. I was glad
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the weather. I would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
disappointed if it were such a bleak. The sun was there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
as a tomato.
Because of this
, our climbing spirit were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
fresh and active. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
eagerly
at the beginning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it wasn't last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
long. To be exact, we were gasping after passing the
first
turn of the tenth. We
utterly
did lots of
Possible spelling mistake found.
warmups
definitely. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
it wasn't covered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
. It would be such a hell if the sun shone
brightly
at that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Half of our snacks
were gone
after reaching to the third hill. We can't even image how we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to the top.
Fortunately
, there were such a long horde both to the way up and down. We could ask
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
due to the fact that we had drank
Consider using "all the".
all of the
water we brought along. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
my mussels couldn't squeeze a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
more, and I was ready to surrender at 3/4 of the length. At that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, all I knew was I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
thirsty and I want to sleep as I consumed all of my energy. We did a long rest as we have had oceans of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to reach at the tip, and we already had planned to sleep there. In no longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, we reached to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. I was huffing and puffing. I glimpsed my guys, and they were the same as I did. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as arrived, we took a quick bath and had our late lunches. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
the feeling of seeing everything from the top is
totally
excellent. To illustrate, there was nothing above us and the liberating ripple of cool breeze had already taken our heat away. We took thousands of photos and came back home at
next
morning. Unfortunately, came back home was under the downpour. It has been linking in my mind. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a plan to go there again without a doubt. All you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do is lots of
Possible spelling mistake found.
warmups
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
climbing and training for a week to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the trip. Don't forget to take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
snacks and drinks. I had a climb,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the view was great.
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If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
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IELTS essay Enjoyable mountain trip I have had

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
437 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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