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Many students think that History is not as interesting and important as Maths, Literature of English...To what extent do you agree or disagree

Many students think that History is not as interesting and important as Maths, Literature of English. . . PEGMj
In the modern society, History is being so underrated by students. Many students belief that History is not play an important role in education in general and in school in specific as Mathematics, Literature, English or even Chemistry. I believe there is no evidence for this declaration. The first reason for scholars do not get interested in History relates to the method they have studied at school. Almost curriculums about History in Vietnam are unintelligible and hard for pupils to understand the knowledge in each period. The more listen to these lessons, the more confused disciples will get. Therefore, pupils will not focused in History and they will get a notion that History is boring and not important. If the History lectures at school can get more practicing and decrease some obscure knowledge that unessential, the students may become involved with History. For example, the History syllabus at school have images and videos of each lesson, tutees can understand the sessions more clearly and they may recognize that History is so principal and indispensable in our spiritual life. There are many benefits we could gain from learning History. Firstly, it will have many knowledge that we may need in the future. Secondly, in some significant tests, History may has been chosen. For instance, the high school entrance exam in Hanoi was chosen History beside Maths, Literature and English. If you do not learn History carefully, you will have difficult to do the examination. In conclusion, History is very momentous for students to study. It should be innovated, so that disciples may feel interested while learning History.
In the modern society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
underrated by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is not play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in education
in general
and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in specific as Mathematics, Literature, English or even Chemistry. I believe there is no evidence for this declaration.

The
first
reason for scholars do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
interested in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
relates to the method they have studied at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Almost curriculums about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
in Vietnam are unintelligible and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for pupils to understand the knowledge in each period. The more listen to these lessons, the more confused disciples will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
.
Therefore
, pupils will not
The verb 'will' requires base form of the verb: "focus"
focused
in
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
History and
they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is boring and not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
lectures at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more practicing and decrease
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
obscure knowledge that unessential, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may become involved with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
syllabus at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
have images and videos of each lesson,
Possible spelling mistake found.
tutees
can understand the sessions more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
clearly and
they may recognize that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
principal and indispensable in our spiritual life.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits we could gain from learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
.
Firstly
, it will have
Possible agreement error. The noun knowledge seems to be uncountable; consider using: "much knowledge", "a good deal of knowledge".
many knowledge
that we may need in the future.
Secondly
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
may has
been chosen
.
For instance
, the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
entrance exam in Hanoi
was chosen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
beside
Possible spelling mistake. 'Maths' is British English.
Maths
, Literature and English. If you do not learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
carefully
, you will have difficult to do the examination.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
momentous for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to study. It should
be innovated
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that disciples may feel interested while learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
.
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A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Many students think that History is not as interesting and important as Maths, Literature of English. . .

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
266 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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