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educations benefits in the country

educations benefits in the country pKEy9
Education is one of the most vital things for the growth of a country. Some people say that students must study whatever they want, however others claims that they must study useful subjects that will greatly affect their future. Many people believe that students must have the freedom in choosing their studying subject. This will allow them to choose what they love the most, and by that they will be brave, and achieve better results that working in a domain where they don't enjoy, for example a person who adores animals, would be a great veterinarian. Moreover, working isn't just about earning money, having a career of which you hate, will turn your life into a miserable one. Others claims that students must be obliged with a specific subject which is helpful in the future. Enhancing technological studies, will help in the evolvement of a country, because now, technology is the most overwhelming subject, where its facing a horrible increase in its demand. On the same hand, studying science for example, will increase your chances of earning more money, since scientists, doctors have a major role in changing people's quality of life, for example the corona pandemic led to the increase in the requests of nurses in almost all countries. Although the huge benefits a person will acquire when studying future-needed subjects, I opine that students must choose their objects freely, and study whatever they feel comfortable with, and brings them joy.
Education is one of the most vital things for the growth of a country.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
whatever they want,
however
others claims that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that will
greatly
affect their future.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have the freedom in choosing their studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to choose what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
the most, and by that they will be brave, and achieve better results that working in a domain where they don't enjoy,
for example
a person who adores animals, would be a great veterinarian.
Moreover
, working isn't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
about earning money, having a career of which you hate, will turn your life into a miserable one.

Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "other claims".
Others claims
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be obliged
with a specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
which is helpful in the future. Enhancing technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
evolvement
of a country,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, technology is the most overwhelming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, where its facing a horrible increase in its demand. On the same hand, studying science
for example
, will increase your chances of earning more money, since scientists, doctors have a major role in changing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's quality of life,
for example
the corona pandemic led to the increase in the requests of nurses in almost all countries.

Although the huge benefits a person will acquire when studying future-needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, I opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
choose their objects
freely
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
whatever they feel comfortable with, and brings them joy.
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IELTS essay educations benefits in the country

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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