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Education is the only important factor to consider when looking for employees. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Education is the only important factor to consider when looking for employees. aVGDX
Nowaday, education is the most important things to consider when you’re finding a job. I absolutely disagree with this statement because people need a job for living, not only educated people. So first I will discuss about employers without education should be respected and we should give an opportunity to them to have a job. First of all, employers without education should be respected. We shouldn’t judge people by education. Even they’re uneducated but they have a good attitude and still need a job for their living. For example they work as a cleaner, factory worker or house keeper they might not get High salary but however they work legally. Secondly, even they’re uneducated but they have their own skill and talent. I think company that consider to hire employees shouldn’t focus only education. For example they might be creative in their own different way, they don’t work hard but they work smart. In conclusion, education is not the only important things, we should respect each other and give them an opportunity to have a better life. In my opinion not all of educated people have good attitude and not all of uneducated people have bad attitude so we completely give them support and sooner or later it will become a great society.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nowaday
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things to consider when you’re finding a job. I
absolutely
disagree with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need a job for living, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
first
I will
Did you mean simply "discuss employers"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about employers
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
respected and
we should give an opportunity to them to have a job.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, employers without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should
be respected
. We shouldn’t judge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Even they’re uneducated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
attitude and
still
need a job for their living. For
The comma is probably missing here: "example, they".
example they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a cleaner, factory worker or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
keeper they might not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
High salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
however
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
legally
.

Secondly
, even they’re uneducated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
and talent. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
that consider to hire employees shouldn’t focus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. For
The comma is probably missing here: "example, they".
example they
might be creative in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
way, they don’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
smart.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things, we should respect each other and give them an opportunity to have a better life. In my opinion not all of educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
attitude and not all of uneducated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
attitude
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we completely give them support and sooner or later it will become a great society.
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IELTS essay Education is the only important factor to consider when looking for employees.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
213 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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