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Education for children is one of the most important factors that affect the future world. And the difference between wrong and right is the primary thing that children should be taught since they are infants.

Education for children is one of the most important factors that affect the future world. And the difference between wrong and right is the primary thing that children should be taught since they are infants. b3NMW
Education for children is one of the most important factors that affect the future world. And the difference between wrong and right is the primary thing that children should be taught since they are infants. That is the reason why there are a lot of parents tend to educate their kids about true and false but by punishments (such as scolding, forbidding, and so on) to make them understand this distinction deeply. From my perspective, I completely disagree with the opinion that children should be taught with punishment because this could lead to phobia and side effects in the kids. I believe that the best punishment for children is gifting them and boosting their desire of achieving compliments when they do the right things. The first reason in favour of my argument is that getting too many punishments forms plenty of phobias inside their children. Therefore the kids will be scared of making mistakes and they will do nothing but get stuck in their comfort zones. Furthermore, they become more and more reliable with their parents. A good example is that these days teenagers have their parents done their chores increasingly because they scare of spoiling the house and they can not do it as well as their mothers. Another reason supporting my viewpoint is that punishment can cause side effects such as being used to abuse. This forms a habit for children that they are similar to the punishment and gradually see it as their part and parcel. For instance, there are lots of videos on Youtube that the children in the clips even argue with their parents as their parents' attitude. In my point of view, children should be taught about how to behave correctly and encourage and compliment their kids to do the right things only. Punishment is not the best method anymore because it causes hurting more than its advantage. I think everyone deserves to be learned gently especially to children who are extremely sensitive. In conclusion, I strongly believe that educating children by punishment is due to anxieties and side effects. Besides that, the best method to educate children is by encouraging and praising them.
Education for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factors that affect the future world. And the difference between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
and right is the primary thing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taught
since they are infants.
That is
the reason why there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
tend to educate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
about true and false
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
(such as scolding, forbidding, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on) to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them understand this distinction
deeply
. From my perspective, I completely disagree with the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taught
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this could lead to phobia and side effects in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. I believe that the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is gifting them and boosting their desire of achieving compliments when they do the right things.

The
first
reason in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of my argument is that getting too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
forms
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of phobias inside their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
will
be scared
of making
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mistakes and
they will do nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
stuck in their comfort zones.
Furthermore
, they become more and more reliable with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example is that these days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
have their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
done their chores
increasingly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they scare of spoiling the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
house and
they can not do it
as well
as their mothers.

Another reason supporting my viewpoint is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
can cause side effects such as being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to abuse. This forms a habit for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
that they are similar to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
and
gradually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
it as their part and parcel.
For instance
, there are lots of videos on
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in the clips even argue with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as their parents' attitude.

In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taught
about how to behave
correctly
and encourage and compliment their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to do the right things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Punishment
is not the best method anymore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it causes hurting more than its advantage. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
everyone deserves to
be learned
gently
especially
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who are
extremely
sensitive.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
believe that educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is due to anxieties and side effects.
Besides
that, the best method to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is by encouraging and praising them.
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IELTS essay Education for children is one of the most important factors that affect the future world. And the difference between wrong and right is the primary thing that children should be taught since they are infants.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
360 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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